DICKS EVERYWHERE

"This is Scout! Rainbows make me cry!"
...40 translations later Google gives us:
"Scouts! Compound bow!"

"I'm going to gut you like a Cornish game hen. "
...50 translations later Google gives us:
"Cornell has tripled."

"Be polite. Be efficient. Have a plan to kill everyone you meet."
...50 translations later Google gives us:
"You are kind. Click OK. Search for killer of distribution of land."

"I'm gonna beat you like a rented mule, boy."
10 translations: "They will work, male prostitute.:
20 translations: "Works fine, and pleasantly?"
30 translations: "Quickly borrowed my ass."
40 translations: "I love children, medical care, intirliokin people buy books."
50 translations: "If you want to, I think, my friend."
56 translations: "I like his son, Fred."

whatthefuck.jpg

  "The answer: Use a gun. And if that don't work? Use more gun"

30 translations later...

"Use of weapons. If this fails, Top Gun."

Alrighty then.

"This dildo makes my vagina hurt so good."

...50 translations later Google gives us:

"Cursed dildo is very angry."

also

"Jesus Christ, Chris chan is making new videos of being a "tom girl"."

...50 translations later Google gives us:

"Film "flavor" of Christianity, Jesus Christ."

"A woman has to be intelligent, have charm, a sense of humor, and be kind. It's the same qualities I require from a man."

10 translations:
>"Women would be wise or have a sense of humor and magic. These are the same quality I need a man."

30 translations:
>"They are fun, good intelligent, can be good. This specification are looking for."

50 translations:
>"Experience and knowledge, white, and put a huge success. Tsharakteristix needs."

WHAT THE FUUUU--

Knew I should'a made a new thread. Ah well.

"It's filling up my womb."
10 translations: full of bees
20 translations: full B
30 translations: Lucas
40 translations: Luke
50 translations: Luke
56 translations: Hatch

wat
40 translations: Luke B

"You're lucky they didn't eat you alive"

...20 translations later Google gives us:

"Fortunately, you do not eat to live.

This one gives me plot ideas.

"I commend my soul to any god that can find it."

...50 translations later Google gives us:

"However, we recommend the Lord."

I feel there's a spiritual message in there somewhere hehe

>>9086
I don't know what I love more: the juxtaposition of input and result, or the fact that you started with Mr Lipwig's last words.

"If God had wanted you to live, he would not have invented me!"

10 translations: "God willing, you can not find the power cord!"
20 translations: "If you want to live in God, leave me alone!"
30 translations: "Otherwise, the life God has for me, run!"
40 translations: "If so, God bless you!"
50 translations: "God wants your life to an end!"
56 translations: "I want to live, you know."

Thus proving once again that everything is funnier with religion.

"Oops! That was not medicine!"

Ten translations later, Google declares:
"UPS will not cure!"

Well, that's probably true...

"If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands."

...50 translations later Google gives us:

"Cotton no luck, I know."

What.

"Here lies Scout. He ran fast and died a virgin."
...50 translations later Google gives us:
"Here, your browser does not support. Time."

"black scottish cyclops"
...50 translations later Google gives us:
"I Klop Scott Black."

"The payload has almost reached the final terminus!"
...40 translations later Google gives us:
"Done!"

"In matters vegitable, animal, and mineral, I am the very model of a modern major-general"
...50 translations later Google gives us:
"Plants, animals and minerals, and other important information about the structure."

"If at first you don't succeed you fail and the test will be terminated"
...50 translations later Google gives us:
"Is this a scam."

"I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these?"
...50 translations later Google gives us:
"Damn Lemon! What should I do?"

"The cake is a lie"

...50 translations later Google gives us:

"Cookies"

Man, talk about simplifying things.

"Hey look buddy, I'm an engineer; that means I solve problems. Not problems like 'What is beauty?', because that would fall within the purview of your conundrums of philosophy. I solve practical problems. "

...50 translations later Google gives us:

"Hi, I have a problem, but engineers believe that this morning, people. This is great, right? "The problem is only a concept, including konundrums practical problems."

"DICKS EVERYWHERE!"
...30 translations later Bing and Google give us:
"All events"

"Trembling enthusiasm over exposed flesh"
...30 translations later Bing and Google give us:
"Meat is free from passion."

"The pen is mightier than the sword if the sword is very short, and the pen is very sharp."
...30 translations later Bing and Google give us:
"Mightier than the sword, knife, short pencil skirt is very bright."

Original text:
"fuck"
...56 translations later Google gives us:
"Exercise"
(This was after it ran the gamut from "absurdity" to "sports.")

Original text:
"Makin' bacon!"
...56 translations later Google gives us:
"Bacon?"
Original text:
"Making bacon!"
...10 translations later Google gives us:
"Bacon, of course!"
Original text:
"Making bacon!"
...10 translations later Google gives us:
"For meat!"

Google Translate is increasingly enthusiastic about bacon.

Original text:
"I'm going to plant one right between your eyes, you punter!"

...30 translations later Bing and Google give us:
"Tigereye Design and culture are right!"

Original text:
"You prancing show ponies!"

...30 translations later Bing and Google give us:
"force as needed."

Original text:
"I've slept in the corpse of water buffalo tougher than you!"

...30 translations later Bing and Google give us:
"Some of the buffalo"

Original text:
"Aaw, did I get blood on your suit?"

...30 translations later Bing and Google give us:
"Yes, I have blood on my clothes?"