Oh hello there. Nice to meet you all again. Here, have a new story. --- Any other day of my life a cigarette would be home base. Like playing a game of tag. Too tired to run? Touch the slide and you’re safe. Nevermind that the heat of the sun has turned the metal of the slide into a frying pan, nevermind that your fingers are now seared and de-printed and the air stinks with the smell of burning flesh. You are safe. And perhaps you have an extraordinary imagination. But someone changed the rules today and cigarette number three has done nothing, and I can see the kid who’s it just running at me and he’s screaming that base isn’t base anymore, there’s no such thing as base anymore, you gotta’ run, you gotta RUN. And there’s nowhere to run. “HEY PY. DINNER.†“Fuck.†I drop the cigarette into the water and squeeze my eyes shut as a shudder runs through my whole body. It’s freezing down here. “Yeah gimme’ a minute.†I tugged my mask out of my pocket and considered it. A few people had seen my face before. I didn’t particularly like it - not for the publicity, but for the light. I’ve spent so much of the past six years looking through smoky glass that unfiltered light burns. But it’s dark out, and maybe if I go up they’ll let me dim the lights. Much to my relief the lights were already dimmed – for him. I couldn’t rightly say what he was, or what business he had with RED, but he was our Medic. We were hurting. It’s a small fort designed for one of each class, and we were down to myself, a Sniper, a lonely Heavy, a Demo, and a Scout. The other four had disappeared long ago, dragged into the ether of a broken respawn. “I’m glad you could join us,†the Medic said. His voice sounded normal, but had all the warmth of silk being dragged over broken glass. It’s a weird analogy, I know. But it’s the only way I can describe it. Like something… smooth and pleasant only barely concealing something very, very dangerous. I digress. He creeped me out. “Y-yeah. I, I’m here.†I grabbed my plate – boiled potatoes and corned beef, courtesy of the Demo. “And I gotta’ run.†“Not shtaying to get to meet your new teammates?†I opened my mouth and looked around. Spy glaring, unblinking. Engineer grinning like a maniac. Soldier… The Soldier was special. The Engineer had been carrying him when they got off of the train. He was a Shovel. Just a shovel. I was baffled. We were missing the rest of him – where’d he go? But half-way through insisting it the Engineer got mean. “What’re you talkin’ about? This is our Soldier and you will damn well appreciate him because he’s won more fights than you have the brain power to imagine the number of.†It took me a while to figure that one out. But I knew right away. They were all insane. What’s even more baffling is that the shovel –sorry, the SOLDIER – has been showing up around the fort all day, and I can’t for the life of me figure out who’s carrying it around. “Pyro?†I blinked a few times and looked to the Medic. “Hwha?†“Tell me about yourself.†He pat the empty chair beside him. “Nothankyou.†And just like that I turned and brought my food to my room. It was an old habit – I could control the lights, I didn’t have to worry about the Scout throwing food in my hair. Certainly not unusual for me. But the Medic would not have it. “You know zat vas rude.†I nearly screamed. The door hadn’t even opened – or if it did the Engineer had lubed it between the time I entered and just then, because that’s a squeaky son of a bitch. “So-sorry force of habi-“ “Vhat’s your name?†“It’s all – it’s in the personnel file in the infirmary you know you really don’t have to-“ “Yes I do.†He leaned in and yes, yes his eyes were red. “I need to know your name, herr…†My tongue was dry, sticking to the roof of my mouth. “Hhhheeeerrrrr-“ “Joseph. J- call me Joey.†I don’t know why I lied. My name wasn’t – isn’t – Joey. In fact it’s a name I’ve always hated. Punks and whinebags go by Joey. Maybe a seven year old can get away with Joey, but I’m not seven. “Joey.†He smiled and pat my shoulder. “Joey, my name is-“ And then he bit me. “WHAT THE FUCK?†It’s the last thing I remember of that night. When I woke up the next morning it was to the sound of the Scout pounding on my bedroom door. “Hey mumblenuts, mission’s starting in, like, twenty seconds. Where the fuck’ve you been?†I was too panicked to remember the previous night, to panic more about the Medic. I pulled my suit on, grabbed my flamethrower, and ran for the gates. I bumped into the Medic along the way and he looked oddly normal. “Herr Pyro are you okay? You slept for over ten hours and you didn’t come down wiz your plate. I didn’t want to impose, but-“ “MISSION BEGINS IN TEN SECONDS!†The look – the sincere, genuine look – of concern didn’t leave his face. “Yh hmm fnne,†I lied. “Okay. Come see me after if you aren’t.†“TWO! ONE!†The sirens rang. The doors opened. We ran. I was so confused.
Mother effing tense changes. Ignore those.
please continue
A new Corvine story? Oh do go on you have my full attention.
II “You did vell today.†I was shaking. I looked up at the Medic. There was nothing to say. “Really. It’s been a vhile since I’ve seen a Pyro wiz zat much…†“FIRE?†The Engineer barked before laughing. He elbowed the Soldier. “Get it? Get it?†The Soldier had scored eighteen kills. This was, of course, according to the HUD in my mask. I hadn’t seen a single one – I hadn’t seen the damn shovel, period. But the red-painted handle was still sticky with old blood, the metal of the blade freshly cleaned, the same as my face was, the same as the Scout’s face was. We didn’t have time for a shower, why would the shovel? “It vas a pleasure,†the Medic went on. “Truly.†He pat my shoulder and I cringed. I watched him eat a man’s face off. When the Spy respawned he didn’t appear for the rest of the match. I didn’t blame him. Ours had disappeared as well, and nothing seemed to be able to draw him out. He was, thus far, the least creepy of the bunch. He had all the demeanour of a regular Spy- holier than thou, dirt and bad clothing are the enemy, what have you. And that gave me an idea. “Yeah okay bye.†I stood and shuffled out of the room, trying not to puke. I mean the man ate someone’s face. And then touched my shoulder. You’d be puking too. -- “Can I ‘elp you?†I found him in the storage shed, counting crowbars. “M-maybe. Listen. I, I’m, I’m going crazy or maybe not I don’t know but I need your help.†I fidgeted with my mask, twisting it in my hands, probably compromising the structure but I didn’t really care. “I’m, I need to know. What the fuck is the Medic? A-and why is our Soldier a shovel and what dropped on the Engineer’s head?†One brow went up. I saw it through the mask, like a caterpillar rolling under the wool. Up, into the hairline, and there it stayed. He clucked his tongue. “You don’t want to know.†He turned to the crowbars. “W-no. No, I, you’re right I don’t want to know but please tell me am I safe at least?†The other eyebrow went up, then they both knit together as he pressed his lips together. He thought about it – truly thought about it, weighing this and that in his mind. I took that right there as the first hint that the answer was no. If the man needed to think that long about- “Oui. You are safe.†He grinned. That was my second hint. I backed out of the shed. -- I didn’t realize how bad of an idea walking backwards was until I woke up in the infirmary. “Wh-†“You had quite ze nasty fall.†The Medic was leaning over me. “Pity. You should be more careful.†He twirled a scalpel in his hand. “What are you going to do with that?†“Fix you.†“I, I tripped. Use the medigun.†“Blood clot in ze back of your shkull. Gun won’t fix it.†“I, I’ve seen that thing replace limbs I don’t think a blood clot will-“ The second the blade sank into the back of my skull was the single most odd moment of my life. Not because of the scalpel – I’ve had surgery before. Scalpels belong in the human body, sometimes, I guess. It was his mouth on my throat, biting. And biting. And, really, not doing all that much. After about ten seconds he finally drew blood, having scraped the skin. My adam’s apple hurt pretty bad and I was pretty sure my trachea was bruised, but that was the extent of the damage. He licked up the blood that oozed out of the small wound. It was the last thing I remembered before the scalpel was removed and the medigun trained on my bleeding head. “Ah, too bad you von’t remember zis,†he murmured. “If only you could be avake. I zink you’d enjoy it.†I didn’t know what he was talking about. I was awake. In pain, yes. Probably paralysed until the medigun did it’s job. Certainly not dead, or gravely injured. The medigun took care of what was left of my conscious state, its healing waves seducing me into sleep. And when I woke up the next day I did remember. I remembered all of it. And while the Medic didn’t seem to notice, the Soldier had. He sat on the edge of my bed when I woke up. The door was still locked. The blood had been cleaned off and the blade polished. “Scout? Scout did you do this?†I called out. “SHUT UP AND PAY ATTENTION THIS IS IMPORTANT.†I am not ashamed to admit that I screamed like a girl.
I'm getting so confused as to what is going on. I thought solly was a shovel? Now he's "sitting" on the edge of the bed? I feel like my head is in Silent Hill.
III I suppose I should clarify that the Soldier didn’t actually talk. It’s a shovel. Shovels don’t talk. But the Soldier’s voice – my Soldier’s voice, the Soldier that had been lost to the Respawn weeks ago – spoke. His voice echoed in my head, so loud that I was certain that the entire fort had to have woken up. “NOBODY else can hear us, you IDIOT. PAY ATTENTION!†I held my blankets tight, eyes wide. “Wh-“ “YOUR TEAM IS GOING TO KILL YOU!†I jumped. “Why? What- wait why am I talking to a Shovel? Wh-“ “STOP. TALKING.†I blinked and I swear to all that is holy, that Shovel was about a foot closer than it’d been before I shut my eyes. “I’m going to puke.†“REFRAIN FROM DOING SO.†He was loud – GOD he was loud. Why couldn’t he be one of those ghosts you heard in the furthest reaches of your hearing? I’d prefer the type of crazy that drives people than this, any day. I blinked again and the shovel was on my night stand, about seven inches from my right arm. “Pay attention,†he said, voice calm. Tame. “The team mates that have been recently deployed to this location are not what they seem. MEDIC.†I jumped. “Is a blood-sucker, and I don’t mean he’s a faggot although he is one of those as well. THE ENGINEER IS A ROBOT! And your new Spy is none other than a HOMOCIDAL MANIAC!†“…we’re at war I, I don’t see what’s wrong with homocida-“ “AND A FAGGOT.†“I’m pretty sure everyone here is at some point a, a faggot I mean we’re surrounded by men and-“ “AND HE HAS THE ABILITY TO SUCK YOUR SOUL OUT JUST BY TALKING TO YOU!†I jumped and pulled the blankets tighter. “Oh.†“That’s more like it.†“And you?†“ARE YOU INSINUATING SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH ME?†“Well, you- you’re a shovel.†I shut my eyes. The Soldier was silent and it suddenly occurred to me that I’d been talking to a shovel for the past fifteen minutes. He remained silent. “Oh God I’m crazy.†I sighed, opened my eyes, and cried out as something metal and smooth smacked me upside the head. “WHAT THE FUCK?†“Hallo?†The door was all but kicked in, a syringe gun pointed at my face. My hands went up. “…Pyro? Are you alright?†“Y-n-wh-“ “You’re bleeding.†I brought one hand down to touch the side of my face. Blood. I looked down. The blade of the shovel was spattered with it. “Did ze shovel fall on you? Vhy do you even have it in here? Never mind, here, let me clean zat up for you.†He leaned in and I smacked him upside the head with the Soldier before running, still carrying the entrenching tool. I bypassed a groggy, coffee-drinking Engineer and a rather unamused Spy before making it to the back door. A quick dash to the tool shed and I was safe, locked away. “Idiot.†“STOP TALKING.†“They know you’re on to them.†“Please stop talking,†I pleaded the Shovel. “Please. Please? Please stop-“ “YOU’RE ONE TO BLUBBER. Annoying pussy faced magget. Listen up. You need to play it reeeeal smooth now. They’re on to you. They know that you know, and if you don’t play this right they’ll know that you know that they know that you know.†“What the f-“ “NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR QUESTIONS.†I rubbed the side of my face. The cut was still oozing and my cheek was now puffy. “When they come in, you need to not freak out, got it?†“You’re one to talk.†I laughed. It was a short, harsh bark of a laugh, but it was there. “Oh God I really am going insane.†“GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF, PRIVATE. When they come in-“ “Pyro?†The door opened. The Spy stood in the doorway, cigarette dangling from his lower lip. “What ze hell-“ I smacked him in the head with the shovel. “WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?†“Sorry.†The Spy was out. I dragged him in and started tying him up with one of the odd bits of twine lying about on the shed floor. “I, I’m just protecting myself is all, no big deal if they’re really that bad then maybe everyone else will understand.†“Get. Ahold. Of. Yourself. Pyro.†Another knock. “Py?†“It’s the Engineer.†He was whispering. “Play it cool, private.†I stood and approached the door. “H-nn?†It was a high pitched, questioning sound. Hardly a word. Embarassing, really. “Py, open up. I think we need to talk.†I opened the door a crack. “Have you seen Spy?†Another crack and the Engineer was down. “THAT is IT.†The shovel dropped from my hands. “I am done trying to help THE SORRY LIKES OF YOU. HAVE FUN IN HELL, MAGGET.†One blink later and I was alone with two unconscious team mates and a lot of twine. “Shit.†I tied the Engineer up as tight as I could and grabbed a crow bar. “Don’t go anywhere,†I whispered to them as I snuck outside. I wedged the tool into the handles, locking them in as best I could, and dashed back to the fort. I never would have guessed that the Scout would betray me. I mean he’s normal. He’s not a blood-sucking homicidal robot shovel. Why would I be afraid of him? But it was his bat across the back of my head in the hallway, and his face was the last thing I saw. “I got’m, Doc. I saw him whackin’ Engie and Spy out in the tool shed, and I don’t mean the gay kinda’ whackin’.†His voice was watery and distant. “You think he’s snapped?†“Oh. Most definitely. Heavy?†Massive, calloused hands encircled my arms. “Am sorry, leetle Pyro.†He threw me over his shoulder, and then all I knew was quiet darkness.
where's the rest?
I must say I am confused, but also extremely intrigued. It's seems like it's all continuous thought, jumping from one moment of consciousness to the next, desperately trying to fit things together but somehow just not quite getting there. In all honesty, though, I only have one question: When will there be more?