1 . Name: Anonamoose @ 2012-03-19 08:54

Hey guys...I've been writing fan-fiction for quite sometime and felt like doing a fic with an OC in it for once...the only problem is that OC fics tend to receive lukewarm reviews at best...This is a really rough draft so please don't hate...IDK if I'll ever put it up...

Overall it seemed like quite the average day at the BLU base, everyone was doing what they’d normally be doing on their odd day off ceasefire; Demoman would be gulping down large quantities of rather expensive whiskey, Engineer would be working on his blueprints or tinkering with something, Spy would be reading his French newspaper while sipping on high quality coffee, Heavy and Medic would be playing chess or generally sharing in some sort of group activity, Soldier would be ranting about war regardless of whether any one was there to listen to him or not, nobody knew what Pyro did…not that they’d want to know…and Sniper was probably camping out in his van creepily watching his team-mates through the scope of his rifle.

Scout, as per usual, was running around the base bored out of his mind, looking for people to annoy while he bragged about his various accomplishments. As fate would have it Scout was mindlessly tossing his baseball around when he heard the sound of a bus pull up into the bases’ driveway.

While Scout jogged off in the general direction of the sound, Sniper had already focused his scope on the object, attempting to catch a glimpse of whoever or whatever the vehicle had brought with it.

Surely enough his patience was rewarded. Out of the large BLU bus stepped an unfamiliar figure, quite an unusually one too, so much so that that Australian had to re-adjust his scope’s focus to make sure he wasn’t seeing things.

He zoomed in for a second time, and almost jumped off his seat at what he saw; there was no mistaking it, whoever this was had to be a new type of class, though he wasn’t quite sure actually which class this new team member belonged to, even more shocking however, was the new addition’s unmistakably female appearance.
From what he could make out of her face, she was undeniably beautiful, full pouty red lips and sparkling green eyes with extremely pale skin, a damn nice body too, toned from what he could see, though she was quite short; her most notable features however, where her breasts, full and perky, about a large E-cup, they looked soft too…His body reacted without him releasing it.

Scout had long since caught up and was likewise enthralled by the appearance of his new companion. His eyes drifted over her uniform, a form-fitting bodysuit with an extremely low neckline, leaving much of her astounding cleavage on display.

“Was ist los?” she asked, unfazed by his gaping mouth. Scout shook his head and replied, “Um, I don’t understand what ya just said…but wow, um yeah, what’s a sweet looking babe like you doin’ out here?” She smiled, at least she knows English, Scout thought in relief.

“Silly American, you’re with the BLU team right? Then I’m your new teammate, the Ice Queen class if you will.” Scout laughed in disbelief, “Hahaha no way! There ain’t no way they’re gonna send a broad out here, not that I’m complaining or nothing.”
“Is dit reg? Heh I tend to forget that I’m a woman at times, don’t worry though, you’ll soon find out that I’m no different from you guys, other than my outward appearance of course; I can fight just as well and get along with guys just fine.” She slung a heavy looking suitcase over her shoulder and began to head towards the base. “I assume you have an extra room, I can room there right?”

Quite excited at the idea of having a woman in the mix, Scout replied energetically, trailing behind her, “I don’t think ya gonna have ta worry ‘bout that! Heck why not just sleep with me baby?” The woman laughed, “I’ll think about it, ok?”

“Yo guys check it! We got ourselves an extra team-mate, a real looker too!” Demoman roused from his sleep to see an overexcited Scout practically bounce in accompanied by a very attractive woman, “Eh I know I must be drunk now, I’m seeing things. Ain’t no way there’s a beautiful lassie here.”

“Naw check! For real! Do you have any idea how awesome this is?” Demoman slurred, “Ye must ‘av got hold of me scrumpy boy, there be no way that illusion is real.” Hearing the commotion, the rest of the team became curious. “Ja well first I need to put this stuff away, then you can perv over me as much as you want. Amerikaaner, could you show me the spare room?”

“Hehe sure thing sweet cheeks, just down the hall there, the dorm next to mine is completely free, or you could just bunk with me as it is, what ta ya say?” The woman sighed and muttered something in a Germanic language, walking straight past a very confused Engineer.

“So let me get this straight…” Spy began, rubbing his temple in annoyance at Scout disability to hardly ever cease in his episodes of spewing verbal nonsense, made ten times worse by the fact that he was extremely overexcited. “We have a new team member…not only that, but it’s a woman?!” The young man nodded vigorously, “Yeah! And she’s real hot too! Like Pyro set her on fire or somethin’!” The masked creation mumbled something unintelligible in response to the remark.

“Well…it’s good to know we’ve got another pair of hands ‘round here, regardless of gender…” Engineer stated briefly, his face reasonably flushed. “So where is this saucy sally then? Even if she can’t fight, she’ll at least be good for other things,” Soldier crackled creepily.

“She’s with the doctor, presumably being shown the ropes.” Demoman giggled, “Eh ‘presumably’? That lucky bastard is probably having first go at her!” The large Russian man across the table glared, “Doctor is not that type of person,” he said defensively, “besides, didn’t little man here say she spoke German when he first saw her, if so then she’s probably from same place as Doctor, even more reason for them to speak.”

Sniper shook his head, “Not quite mate, that accent is quite familiar to me, though it is a bit off. I recon though she’s probably from similar place, she wasn’t originally born there.”
“Ja you’re right there, mate.” Sniper jumped up at bit, standing next to the Doctor, was the new member of the team, smiling playfully at him.

“Now listen here, this frau is a member of zis team und I von’t have her treated any different just because of her gender and possession of mammary glands,” she smiled at the doctor, who reddened somewhat, before taking a seat next to Sniper.

“Um I suppose I should introduce myself then? I’m the Ice Queen class, as the name suggests it is a class which is both uniquely female and uses ice as a weapon, its primary being an ice-gun which works in a similar way to Pyro’s flame thrower, dealing damage over time, secondly, I have an icicle-gun, which is actually what it sounds like, for my melee I have an ice-pick, pretty corny but I think it does the job well enough. Are there any questions?”

Scout raised his hand, “What’s your favorite position?” Spy smacked the boy for his insolence, “Please forgive the little virgin runt, he has no experience when it comes to dealing with women. Where are you from, if I might ask?”

Ice Queen’s face lit up, she secretly preyed on male virgins, not that she’d ever mention that fact to her teammates…”No problem. Hmm well I’ve just graduation from an honors class in Linguistics in Amsterdam, so my family and I have been living there for about 4 to 5 years, originally though; I was born in South Africa though…one of Australia’s cousins if you will…”
“You’re far too pale to be from there Sheila, lots of folk from that place came to Australia, none nearly as light-skinned as you, I’m not implying that I’d expect you to be African either, I’m not as stupid as these American wankas here.”
“I’m used to being told that,” she smiled, her face flushing somewhat.

The rest of the team, or at least the majority of them, saw the chemistry right away and felt their hearts sink a bit, whether either one of them was aware of it though remained to be seen, though Sniper unconsciously shifted closer towards her.

“Ah well it’s a pleasure to have you, mam” Engineer blushed, tipping his hat, “If ya need anything, just let me know, I suspect you’ll want to return to organize your room?” She nodded, “Danke, I hope I can get to know you all far better.”


“Aw no way!” Scout protested, “there’s no way you’re going to have the first swing at her! I totally claim dibs!” Medic grunted, “she’s no-one’s possession, so they’ll be no fighting over her. Honestly, I hope you Dummköpfe don’t get too distracted by her external appearance.”

That wasn’t going to stop anyone however; from now on everyday would be a challenge to see who could impress the new team member the most. Eventually, everyone headed off to their respective rooms, Medic having to check to make sure no-one tried to break into her room and force themselves upon her.
The next morning, while the Ice Queen was performing a stereotypically womanly duty, making pancakes for the rest of the group, Engineer raised a point which was of valid concern, “She don’t have her own bathroom do she, where’s she gonna shower?” Scout gave a naturally juvenile answer, “I don’t see a problem with her showering with the rest of us.”
Spy faced palmed himself, “Non, that simply won’t do. I doubt she’d feel comfortable with that anyway, honestly, you know nothing about women do you?” Soldier giggled childishly, obviously thinking something obscene.

“Well,” Engineer blushed, “We’ll just have to give her set time to use them then…ask her before we shower, ya know, that kind of thing?”

Spy nodded, quickly shushing the group as the woman in particular came towards them carrying a stack of pancakes, many of the team ogled her selflessly, since she was wearing a short satin nightgown with no sign of a bra underneath, apparently not having bothered to change before setting off to work, she honestly didn’t seem to notice, let alone mind, the intense stares she was receiving.

They ate in silence for the most part, aside from the occasional comment about how much better food tasted when prepared by a woman, aside from Pyro, who Ice Queen knew liked to eat alone, so that no-one could see under the mask, everyone was present…well, almost everyone….

“Where’s Sniper? Shouldn’t be eating with us?” Clearly no-one had told her that Sniper liked to camp off-base, very rarely entering it at all. “In his van, nasty place…jarate all over the place I reckon, no-one ever goes in there.”

The busty brunette raised an eyebrow,” Was die fick ist ‘jarate’? Ag never mind…I ought to bring him this…he can’t really complain when I look like this,” Alarm bells sounded in pretty much everyone’s mind, “Ah that’s NOT a good idea!” The woman smirked, “You’re just jealous that I’m not being you breakfast in bed, though all you need to do is ask.” Her breasts bounced as she rose from the table and began to walk off, carrying a plate of pancakes in her hands.
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Sniper heard someone approach his van; moving cautiously, he picked up his rifle and steadied his scope, nothing. Nervous now, he picked up his machete, and headed towards the door, when a knock sounded. Truly in awe, the Aussie slowly swung it open, revealing a sight which almost made him double over from the sudden blood rush to a certain area. “Oie, whatcha doing out here Shelia?”
Not saying anything, the scantily-clad woman handed over the plate of pancakes, “Brought you this. Mind if I come in?” Sniper stared blankly, at a complete loss for words. He nodded, embarrassed at the state of his van, the last person he expected to come visit him was a woman, bringing him breakfast, was this some kind of strange dream?

She flopped down on his bed, not paying any attention to the mess surrounding her. “Eh, thanks…” Not wanting to offend her, he took a bite, quite pleased at the way it tasted. He turned around, wanting to thank her but she seemed to have fallen asleep. He gulped, here he was, alone in his camper van with a satin night gown clad woman who’d just given him breakfast.
Oh God! He reacted over, completely unsure of what to do, did he really want to take advantage of a sleeping woman, one who’d only been here for a day?

“Yo sweetcheeks, you in there?!”It was that bloody Scout. “What the bloody hell do you want you bloody wanka!” The young man seemed disappointed to hear a male voice, even more so when a realization dawned upon him. “Aw no way! You scoring in there? I told you I had dibs!” The Australian growled, sitting in an awkward position due to the reaction that had increased as a result of the stupid American runt suggesting ‘that’.

“No! She’s sleeping for gravy’s sake!” He blinked, realizing what he had just said. “No way! You’ve already done it! OMG I’m tell the others!” Scout sped off, “No you’ve got the wrong idea you bloody wanka! Come back here!” But it was already too late, Scout was halfway to the base.

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Oh God that was incredibly lame...this really was written very hastily I assure you...

(Banned: Underage Behavior)