Important Note: Sexy times don't happen until after they graduate. Don't be afraid because the back story will have even younger kids in it. Nothing but fluff, triumph, fear, sorrow, and a little blood letting happens during that time of their lives. Also, Spy needs to lay down an ass-whoopin' on Scout Dad but that'll be awhile. I have no idea when or if I'll ever finish this. I'm bad about finishing things. Also, I edited some things. I fixed mistakes and added in some new descriptions plus Scout's reasoning into the first chapter. If you've read this before, please skim it for the Final Combat reference, if nothing else. Meet the Firebat meets Picasso's Rose Period. I am perhaps too pleased with that (even if it requires research to get the joke... I certainly needed it.) I confess that I stole this idea from another author, named Kathy-chan, but I'm running it under the goal posts, past the fence, and I'm now out in the vacant lot a few yards over. I never intended to continue it but then the plot bunnies attacked me, like they always do, and I had to write Dell's side of the story. At this stage in my mind, with where things are going, it looks like Dell shall be a Victorious Childhood Friend but the back story will take awhile and then from there it still isn't immediate. Poor Heavy. One of these days I need to write a story where Heavy succeeds. WARNING: THIS PROBABLY SUCKS! I don't write teenagers or kids very well, my accents always need work, and my descriptions are limited by short-sightedness and only a minor amount of researching. Leave constructive criticisms, damn it! A Parallel Line Ch. 1 The incessant beeping crept into the young man's brain through his ears, leaving the bright morning sun yearning and envious as it was held back from his eyes by the firm, steely grasp of the window blinds. Scout sighed as he blearily forced an eye open and gently pressed the button on top of his alarm clock, which silenced it by satisfying its burning desire to grab his attention. He understood that quite well, being the youngest out of eight. Too bad he wasn't a little kid anymore; someone his mother HAD to pay attention to. He groggily reflected that growing up wasn't all bad, as he shrugged on his favorite red BONKMan!â„¢ t-shirt and a pair of ratty old blue jeans with massive holes in the knees from untold years of exertion by its previous owners. Scout was almost out of high school, though this last year had been the most tedious and agonizing to get over when the end was so close! It was only because of his best friend Dell, utter nerd but a blast to hang out with as far as nerds went, that had kept him from dropping out of high school out of sheer boredom. That and he was almost certain his PE teacher, the former drill sergeant Mr. Doe (fittingly dubbed Soldier by all his students), would have hunted him down and killed him for leaving the track team hanging. The guy had coaxed him into taking PE the entire time he was in high school. Not that Scout needed much convincing, since it was his favorite class. Scout was certain Mr. Doe was in cahoots with his mom, since the old man kept badgering him about how Scout was too scrawny and needed to stop skipping meals. “SCOUT! Get ya butt down here or ya oatmeal is gonna get cold!†his mom yelled up the stairs. “I'm comin'! I'm comin'!†He took the stairs two at a time, his worn-out gray duffel bag slapping against his back as he did, and skid to a halt as he almost ran into one of his older brothers. His family had a tendency to eat like a pack of wolves, his mother included, so it was no surprise to him that none of them really noticed when all he ate was the bowl of hot oatmeal and strawberries. Greasy stuff like bacon and eggs made him queasy early in the mornin' but luckily anything left was fought over, so Scout never had to worry about it getting wasted. “Salut, mon ami! I must say, you are looking well this morning.†Scout glared over the rim of his glass of orange juice at the only other person at the table with some self-restraint and hated the man all the more for the fact they shared a common trait. His step-father, who was dressed in the ugliest reddish brown pinstripe business suit that Scout had ever seen, was casually eating a bowl of frosted flakes and banana slices. The guy just chuckled whenever Scout showed resentment and politely ignored him afterward. Then again, Scout was the only one who bothered giving the guy a hard time. The triplets liked the idea of having a father figure they could go to for advice and play Bridge with. George and Terry were too busy worrying about staying out of jail for selling hard drugs and illegal arms on the street corner. Clancy and Duke were actively trying to get arrested by robbing banks because they had some hair-brained scheme to break their REAL father out of jail and get mom remarried to him. Their mother was too busy trying to get them married off to good women or trying to turn their lives around to notice how Scout felt, unless he was being openly rebellious. Scout couldn't help it though. He hated his real dad for being such a dumb piece of shit and getting caught by the cops. Yet some part of Scout hoped that Clancy and Duke would succeed and that their dad would show up to make this tooty-fruity pencil-pusher cry like the wimpy little shit that he was. He admired his dad for being such a hardcore badass motherfucker, who had rival gang members quaking in fear. Deep down Scout just wanted to have someone he could make proud; someone he could look up to. Maybe dad hadn't always been there for him but he was still Scout's father. “SCOUT! Stop daydreamin' or you're goin' to be LATE again!†his mother snapped. Scout stopped trying to bore his eyes through the back of his step-father's skull, as the man stood up to rinse the dishes already emptied. He gave his mother an apologetic smile and a thumbs up as he scooted out of his chair. “Don't worry, Ma! I'm the fastest thing around.†His mother rolled her eyes but grabbed his arm as he shot past her on his way out the door. He stumbled and then rolled his own eyes as she pointed at her cheek. “Give ya mother a kiss, baby,†she insisted. Like the dutiful and loving son that he was, he gladly complied, but took off like a bat out of hell the minute she let go of him. His sour mood began to soar as he felt the wind rush past his face and the blood pumping in his veins, his heart pounding with adrenaline as he took the block between him and his high school by storm. People stopped and stared but he ignored them as he pushed himself to the limit, until Scout was gasping for breath and had to walk the rest of the way, slowly coming down from his brief high. The first bell rang as he entered through the side door. In the hall he found a familiar hulking figure waiting, brow knit together with worry as the big guy peered one way, then the other, and finally caught sight of him. The guy's features immediately brightened as he made his way over, laughing loudly and clapping Scout on the back affectionately as Scout stood there, bent over and clutching his mostly bare knees as he continued gulping in huge breaths of air through his nose. Per usual, his friend had an open black leather vest on, the one he never left home without. Under that was a faded red shirt with a classy parody on the front. Dell had explained it to Scout once before. It was based on one of Kicasso's paintings, Firebat's Family With a Cat, from his Rioting Circus Performers period, where a photo of Poopy Joe had been artificially added in place of the cat. Scout generally forgot how many ways it was supposed to be funny but it always put a smile on his face whenever he saw it. Not that Heavy didn't do that most of the time on his own. “Ahh, Scout!†Heavy said, “I was worried for minute. Should not be. You are always late.†Scout took a quick glance to check that they were alone before winking. He was about to lay it on thick. That's what all those sensitive artsy types liked, after all. “Couldn't miss,†Scout said, still catching his breath, “...a day without you.†He straightened up just as the big guy leaned in, grabbing his narrow chin in one massive bare hand before crushing their lips together in a rough, fierce kiss. Scout tried to jerk away, afraid someone might see and also not really in the mood to make out. “'EY! Fuck! No! How many times I gotta tell ya not to get all grabby in school?†Scout whispered as loudly as he dared. He smacked away Heavy's hand as Heavy tried to do it again and glared hard, until Heavy chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck with embarrassment. The big guy was usually pretty gentle, probably had to be with that much muscle, but sometimes even his hormones got the better of him. The guy's name wasn't really Heavy, of course, but everyone called him that because of his massive size and unsubtle nature (not to mention his real name was a bitch to pronounce.) He could have been a quarterback but Heavy, in spite of his love for teamwork and camaraderie, wasn't the most coordinated guy in the world. That coupled with his sheer size meant the other kids tried to avoid him in the halls for fear of unintentional bruises, from being knocked into open lockers or onto the floor. It was therefore perfectly acceptable for Heavy to wait until everyone else was mostly in class before walking towards his own, instead of squeezing through the crowd of students every day. Luckily Heavy also hid the kind of smarts no one would've guessed could lurk in the depths of someone so brutish looking (the guy usually wore fingerless leather gloves outside school. Decidedly badass.) Heavy was in the chess club and a prominent supporter of Dungeons and Dragons, the latter of which he'd introduced Scout and Dell to even if they weren't nearly as enthusiastic about it as he was. Scout normally never would have met the surprisingly nerdy Russian-born student at all, since they had most of the same classes but at different hours, if not for Dell taking Orchestra with the guy while Scout was in PE. Dell had introduced them during lunch one day and seemed to regret it now, though Scout didn't know why. Maybe Heavy got on his nerves more than Dell was willing to admit, being the exceedingly polite southern-born gentleman that he was. Heavy sighed and broke the stare between them reluctantly as they parted ways. It left Scout puzzled and more thoughtful than usual the rest of the day. Scout had never bothered to classify what they had but it was definitely more than just friends. Scout had been the one to start the whole thing, being a horny little pervert with a desperate need for someone to pay attention to him and only him. He'd chosen Heavy because Heavy was more predisposed to getting close, something about being Russian, and because if Scout was going to throw caution to the wind and test the burning desire he'd been having of late for... for other guys, well he'd better pick the biggest, brainiest, nicest, manliest guy that he knew! Of course, Dell had been his friend the longest and he also fit the bill but Scout couldn't risk losing Dell's seemingly endless kindness because Scout wanted to know if kissing a guy would feel better than kissing girls had been. Scout didn't know what he'd do if someone found out what Scout was doing, told Dell, and then Dell hated him for doing queer shit. No, he'd figured it would be a lot easier to lose Heavy, even if Heavy was also a great friend. Heavy had been uncertain at first, after the brief kiss Scout had given him, but quickly became the more openly and consistently affectionate between them. Probably a worse pervert, if there was any way to gauge such a thing, because Heavy had eventually fallen into touching and kissing him like it was normal. All Scout really knew was that he'd decided to take a chance on the walk home from their last study group at the library, after they'd parted ways with everyone else, and it had paid off in spades. Maybe too well. Scout was kind of nervous about how much he was enjoying it. Was that normal? He hadn't intended for it to become anything, he just needed to KNOW if what he thought was right, no matter how crazy it seemed, but as soon as Heavy got it into his head that Scout was interested, he— CRACK! Scout jumped visibly as a ruler came crashing down onto the desk in front of him, knocking his pencil to the floor with the force of the blow. He turned to see Mr. Mundy walk past him with that damn smirk he always had after catching someone who wasn't paying attention. Scout wished he could punch the guy but as long as Mr. Mundy didn't lay a hand on him, there wasn't any excuse. “Scout, ya mind coming up here and solving this one?†Mr. Mundy asked. Scout groaned. Of course he minded, he hadn't been paying any attention and didn't know how to do it, but he couldn't say that. Instead, he grumbled under his breath as his chair screeched back. He walked to the front with his eyes on his sneakers, before grabbing a piece of chalk and silently begging it to save him as he tapped it onto the chalkboard, pointing it at one of the equations with a hopeful cheekiness. “This one?†Scout asked. “That one's already solved,†Mr. Mundy answered with a sneer, “But since you need the help... this 'ould be the one.†The rest of the class was snickering as quietly as they could and Scout glared at them before scowling at Mr. Mundy, who had used the ruler to point at the only equation left unsolved on the board. The next several minutes were painful as Scout stared despondently at the numbers and symbols in front of him and Mr. Mundy eventually walked him through the process. It was the longest insinuation of stupidity Scout had dealt with in his life and it was all directed at him. Thank GOD it was the last class of the day! Dell was still waiting at the door for him, after Mr. Mundy was done chewing him out for never paying attention and turning his homework in unfinished, and Scout followed him out into the hall with his head hung in shame and resentment. “Ya know, I tried to get yer attention before he came over but you were out in space somewhere,†Dell said, “What's eatin' at ya? Is it yer family again?†Scout shook his head and Dell gave him a brief, one armed hug that made a smile creep across Scout's face in spite of Scout's insistence on being petulant and moody about it. He hugged Dell back, equally as brief, and shrugged awkwardly. Dell was his best friend and sometimes it hurt to know he could never tell him. The guy was surprisingly manly, with a minor love of sports, no matter his inclination for tinkering with weird electronic shit that lead him to create the winning science fair projects year after year. He also had a jaw big enough to stop a water buffalo in its tracks (Heavy's was big enough to stop an elephant.) Though Dell was several inches shorter than Scout, there was a breadth to his shoulders and limbs that made Scout secretly a little jealous. Scout wasn't a stick; he'd packed on some hard, lean muscle of his own but what was it with these guys who had brains AND brawn without even trying? Scout wondered if it was the flannel shirts, ala Heavy, or the wild cowboy hat, ala Dell, that gave it to them. Or maybe it was the way they both shaved their hair off, Dell for practical reasons (less maintenance work in the long run) and Heavy because he liked how it looked. Scout was too vain to shave off all of his. Maybe just shaving off the sides, around his ears and in the back, would be enough to offer some improvements? “Scout... I know you have it rough, with them bein' degenerates and all,†Dell began. “'EY! My family ain't degenerates!†Scout snapped. Dell had the sense to look embarrassed and held up his hands in an attempt to appease him. “I didn't mean nothin' by it! But Scout, I... yer mah—mah best friend. I don't want to see you in trouble like yer pa or yer brothers. If you need me, I'm here for ya,†Dell said. Scout looked down at the hand Dell had placed on his shoulder, as Dell looked up at him with complete honesty and concern, and then down at his own feet. He felt worse because that wasn't the reason at all, or well, he didn't THINK it was. Now he really didn't know what to say. “He has many friends,†another deep voice cut in. Scout felt another strong hand on his other shoulder and this time looked directly up into Heavy's blue eyes. Heavy was giving Dell a surprisingly stern glance and Dell was returning the strength of it in equal measures. Now Scout just felt weird because he had no idea why they were fighting over this but it was kind of obvious that they were. Did Dell feel like Scout was ignoring him because Scout wanted to be alone with Heavy sometimes? Shit, he didn't mean to make his best friend feel unwanted! “Knock it off, fellas,†Scout muttered. He affectionately squeezed both their hands before shoving them off. He thought that might get their attention but he had to snap his fingers in front of their faces when they continued to stare at one another without saying anything. “YO'! I'm still here! I just got a lot on my mind, okay? Like, what to do after school ends,†he added. It was a lame lie but it was sort of true. Summer was around the corner and with it graduation. He still had no idea what he wanted to do with his life. Dell finally looked at Scout and nodded, accepting it. “You should be careful then, partner,†Dell said, “Mr. Mundy ain't got no problems failin' ya if ya drop the ball on the final exam and yer gettin' sloppy in history ta boot! Miss Pauling ain't playin' with ya. And no matter how drunk he is, Mr. DeGroot ain't either.†Scout snorted and waved it off. Especially since everybody thought Mr. DeGroot's English literature class was a joke. A really hilarious joke filled with several hours of wildly unrelated movies and Mr. DeGroot's drunken rants which proved he really should have been the Chemistry teacher. Then there were the days when Mr. DeGroot showed up sober and it was as boring as Miss Pauling teaching history. “Ah, no sweat. We'll just study for the exams and it'll be a breeze.†“I hope so,†Dell murmured, “Well, I oughta get home now. You folks have fun.†Scout considered asking him to come with them but Heavy draped one massive arm over his shoulders and waved as he hummed that little tune he was so fond of. Scout decided to let it go as Dell disappeared into the parking lot and began to snort with fighting back a laugh as he remembered something from earlier that day. He motioned for Heavy to lean in as they began to slowly walk towards the street and whispered in the general direction of Heavy's ear as he fought to control himself. “'Ey, I almost forgot. Guess what I saw today in PE!†“Oh, I am no good with guessing. It was funny, da?†Scout nodded and began to chuckle openly. “Oh man! He'd kill me if he knew I saw! Ya know Mr. Doe, right? He's the PE teacher. Anyway, I caught 'im in his office with Mr. DeGroot but luckily they didn't see me!†Heavy's eyebrows arched upward and he blinked. “The one who has no business teaching English? I could do better job.†Scout nodded again, grinning from ear to ear now. “Hahaha! YEAH! They were drinkin', and I saw the bottle, so they were DRINKIN' if ya catch my drift.†“I am to catch drift?†Heavy asked. His features were screwed up in an odd mixture of confusion and sadness. Scout sighed and patted Heavy's back encouragingly. “I mean it was whiskey or somethin'. And I swear, no lie, I think they were makin' out! I guess old Soldier got drunk too. I didn't stick around so I wouldn't get caught and I didn't get the best look but they were really close and... I think Solly grabbed his ass!†Heavy snorted but he seemed amused as well now. They continued walking around the dwindling amount of parked cars (Heavy was never going to make it through by darting between them, as Scout normally would have) and he squeezed Scout closer to his side as he mulled this information over. Scout couldn't say he minded it. He'd had a very unfortunate and confusing chubby from that sight and it was great that he could now share the humor and a little closeness with someone else. “You know, some day, I would be willing to go past this... this making out, as you call it,†Heavy admitted. Scout froze at that, stopping entirely, and squinted up at Heavy nervously. “Yeah, no dice! I mean, I'm still thinkin' about it but this stuff ain't goin' nowhere 'til one of us has a place of our own,†Scout muttered as quietly as he could. He had the urge to check around them but he hadn't seen anyone going towards the cars right ahead and Heavy's firm grip made it harder to look behind him. Heavy chuckled and indicated what was around them with his free hand. “Or perhaps car,†Heavy said, “I have heard car is acceptable,†Scout shivered and shook his head obstinately. “NO! No cars. People can see in the windows! And I ain't gay! We ain't gay. Come on, I say shit but I'm all words and no action. On dis anyway. It's kind of weird,†Scout said. Scout wasn't sure why but sometimes he scared himself. This was definitely one of those times. He wished it was all as simple as watching Mr. DeGroot slouching over Mr. Doe as Mr. Doe leaned back in his chair and held him close. They made it look so easy and natural for those few minutes that Scout had peeped into the window before realizing he needed to run back into the gym locker room, tear off his gym clothes, and put his regular clothes back on before running to his next class. Heavy nodded and for a moment looked as lost and nervous as Scout himself. “I am not trying to push you. I am... I don't know myself. This is all new to me. I would never have... never have kissed boy if I had not felt—felt, ah. This is trouble with English. I could say to you what I mean in better words if it were Russian, I promise,†Heavy muttered. Scout smirked. “You wouldn't even talk to me for a week after I did that. I thought you hated me at first. I was just glad you didn't TELL everyone,†Scout said. Heavy squeezed Scout's shoulder and shook his head. He'd already apologized for that before but Scout had to bring it up. “It was difficult. I knew this was strange, even for American,†Heavy said, “And you had equal hand in avoiding me when you were scared baby.†Then he smiled, to brighten up the mood maybe. He tried to tickle Scout under his arm and Scout writhed, laughing. Heavy laughed as well and his expression turned suggestive. “I know how to raise spirits! We should go to my house again. I am thinking perhaps we should not be thinking. Kissing is good distraction,†Heavy said, “Mother is visiting Aunt and Father is at work.†Scout squirmed out of Heavy's grip and punched Heavy's arm with the kind of playful harshness that showed he didn't mean it but that he did have a point to make. Then he laughed again. “Bullshit! I ain't helpin' you babysit ya little sisters again!†“Why not?†Heavy mused, “They like you very much!â€
Sorry this ends on kind of an extreme cliff-hanger. I can't help it, I swear. I got sidetracked because I started writing the RED Soldier as a Woman story (which I also intend to post at some point.) Anyway, it gets better. As in, shit gets real. I hope they're relatively in character. I know Scout comes off strong but I swear (and I hope) that I shall make their eventual friendship natural... there is a lot more to show after that (lots of cute fluff, like a scene where Scout helps Dell stay warm.) As always, give me constructive criticism. Ch. 2 When the Conagher's moved because of Mr. Conagher's job, Dell wasn't certain what to expect. He knew there would be a huge difference between good ol' Bee Cave and Boston, beyond size alone. There was Austin after all, not far from Bee Cave, and Dell had been there more than once but he knew that wasn't the same thing. Massachusetts was not Texas, no sir. Dell remembered enough geography and geometry lessons for that. Unfortunately, no amount of study beforehand would compensate for the real thing, which made Dell nervous all the same. It was the cold that took Dell by surprise first. He knew the summers shouldn't be as extreme and the seasons were more diverse. He thought he might look forward to it, considering how rarely it snowed in Bee Cave. They had moved in late September, when Dell was twelve, and he had expected to miss his friends, his home, and to feel awkward in a completely new place, but nothing had prepared him for what would turn out to be the exact opposite of summer in Texas. His mother had urged him to bring his sweater on the longest drive ever but before they were even done moving in the boxes that day, Dell was searching through them for his biggest, warmest coat and bundling up when it was still autumn. Winter that first year was terrible. Though the buildings were thankfully all very toasty, their new house included, the world outside was a nightmare. They had to go shopping for much heavier clothes before the first snowfall hit. At first it was magical, being surrounded as far as the eye could see by a blanket of white, glistening like a sea of pearls whenever the sun came out, and being able to really BUILD something with snow for the first time. After the initial whirlwind romance, the snow quickly wore out its welcome. He was soon about as sick of it as everyone else was. Probably even more so. While the other kids still played in it from time to time, Dell went back to his legos, erector sets, and any unattended old kitchen appliances or power tools he could get his hands on. It only took him after the first five times of taking something apart to finally figure out how to put it back together. Before long he'd managed to convince his father into getting him a model train and a remote control car for Christmas, secretly wanting to hybrid the two into a train that ran on remote control instead of on an electric track. Of course, that wasn't the end of Dell's unhappy uprooting. During the first few weeks of being the new kid, Dell ran the gauntlet of being teased for his Texas twang and his amiable, laid-back nature in the face of adversity. For some reason, the way he'd tried to laugh with them when they were laughing at him got on some of the other boys' nerves and it pushed them to keep mocking him, trying to get him to crack. Over the next few months, this eventually turned into some knock-down drag-out fights and one bully got his head slammed into the toilet when a couple of them had tried dunking Dell's head into it. This was startling enough that the bully who was bleeding from it was embarrassed and the other bullies decided to mock him for this apparent sign of weakness, allowing Dell to sneak away. Dell almost got suspended for that but his mother had convinced the principle and teachers that Dell couldn't possibly have anything to do with fighting and that Dell wouldn't have anything to do with any other fights, regardless of who was at fault. He got an earful from both his parents that night and resolved that no matter what happened, he'd find some way to make his mother's promise come true. It was January, two weeks after Christmas and New Years, when it snowed so heavily that Dell couldn't imagine how the streets would ever thaw out or how any of the buses could get through but school wasn't closed one bit. In home room Dell's new friends, the boys who liked learning and actively enjoyed things like science and history, were expressing nostalgia for recess, noting that the snow outside was perfect for snowballs and snow forts. Dell shivered at the very thought of playing out there in the icy wind. The sky looked so pale and bleak and the trees were skeletons to be mourned after all the bright leaves that Dell had admired not too long ago. Dell turned away from the window when the bell rang for second period and there was the usual scuffle to pack things up and go. He winced as he remembered his next class was in the next building over, across the little covered “bridge†that was built between the two buildings. It was covered but not heated, having nothing more than a series of columns to hold the roof up. His friends, on the other hand, were eager once they decided there was just enough time to fool around in the yard between classes. Dell smiled when they asked him to join in but merely watched instead, hugging himself to increase his warmth. He noticed a sudden puff of breath appear over his shoulder and was turning to see who it was, unnerved by the closeness of its owner, only to find himself shoved face first into the snow drift before he had the chance. His friends stopped shouting with glee as Dell sat up on his knees, wiping melting snow off his face and gasping as some of the stinging ice water managed to slip past his coat collar and under his thick, woolen sweatshirt. The jerk behind Dell was laughing and pointing as he stood over him. “'EY! What's wrong? Ya too much of a nerd ta play with da otha nerds? Hahaha!†The other boys looked nervously from Dell to this kid that Dell didn't recognize. His friends had hard-packed snow in their winter gloves, all ready to use, but stared mutely at the bully like deer caught in a headlight instead. Dell couldn't imagine why. This kid wasn't one of the bigger ones Dell had run into. Frankly he was kind of pathetically scrawny, judging from the way his clothes hung off his body in enormous folds. Maybe he was part of some gang of bullies that Dell hadn't met yet (as hard as that was to believe; Dell was positive he'd been introduced to all of them fist-first by now.) The skinny kid was wearing layers of clothes that Dell had just realized must be a few sizes too big and had what looked to be a healing black eye, now that he was paying attention. Dell was suddenly caught between a mix of anger and pity, even as the kid continued laughing before walking away. Apparently he didn't want to stick around long enough to make them really miserable. Dell fumbled for a second as he stood back up, misjudging where the ground was under the snow, and one of his pals rushed over to lend a hand. “Should I even bother askin' who that was?†Dell wondered aloud. “GREG, you liar! I thought you said that guy got EXPELLED!†“I thought he DID! This sucks!†Greg whined. “Expelled!†Dell repeated, “That scrawny buckaroo didn't look bad enough for expellin'. Dumber 'an a sack of bricks, maybe.†Greg came over, dropping his snowball in the process, and wrung his hands in front of him as he talked, eyes wide and worried. “NO! No way! Stay away from him. Do whatever it takes! He's a criminal; he stole crap from the teachers and I don't even know what else but he's... I've seen him pick on the bullies. He's like a bully to BULLIES! Think about it.†“THAT fella' picks on other bullies? But he ain't big enough!†Dell said. Greg threw his hands up in exasperation. “He's a CRIMINAL,†Greg insisted, “He's like a gangster or somethin'. His father is a gangster, all his brothers are gangsters, and he's gonna be a gangster. He's always lookin' for a fight. RUN if he comes after you again!†One of the other boys shook his head frantically. “You can't outrun him! I've tried.†“Yeah, he's too fast! You've got to hide and hope. That's what I did.†Dell shivered more than before and gasped as the five minute bell rang. Shoot! They straightened up from their huddle of fear and scurried into the building, relieved to be more worried about their respective teachers being annoyed with them. Dell slunk into his next class with Greg and was understandably shocked to find the skinny kid sitting in the very back, behind Greg's desk and beside his own. So something had kept the kid out of school for as long as Dell had been there. He looked at Greg for the answer but Greg only shrugged sheepishly as the teacher insisted they both sit down and open their text books. Logically, if Greg had thought the kid was expelled, maybe he'd only been suspended. That had to be a mighty long suspension or so Dell had thought. He'd never been suspended in his life before and neither had any of his friends, former or current. Dell decided he'd just ignore the skinny kid for as long as he could but it wasn't long before he heard Greg cry out, albeit softly. Greg was holding a hand to cover his ear and the kid was flicking his index finger aggressively towards Greg's hand “Scout!†the teacher snapped, “If you do that again, you're out of this class and back in the principle's office! Understood?†The kid, Scout obviously, hunched his shoulders and scowled. It looked like he'd been to the principle's office plenty of times and he didn't care but he accepted that there was a more pressing threat behind the teacher's words, one strong enough to at least pretend he'd behave. Great. Dell wasn't looking forward to this. He almost hoped Greg might bear the brunt of some other attack just so Scout would get the book thrown at him. Maybe suspended again! Dell had been happy before Scout showed up. It stood to reason things would go back to normal once he was gone. Of course, the minute Scout saw Dell watching him, Scout grinned. Dell immediately retreated to his text book, hoping it might save him. It worked for a few minutes but then, out of nowhere, a thick, tightly folded piece of paper hit the side of Dell's head and landed on his desk. Dell was startled enough to glare over at where it had so obviously come from. Scout had the nerve to stare straight ahead, looking for all the world as if nothing had happened except for the telling smirk on his face. Dell growled and picked it up, tempted to throw it right back, before he saw the words “Read Me†scrawled across one side. Oh no. NO. This kid was NOT passing him notes in class. Dell hesitantly opened it anyway, wondering what sort of insults the kid could have for him after knowing him for all of ten or fifteen minutes. What he found inside was worse. It was a threat insisting that Dell do this kid's homework for him or he'd pound Dell's face in the next day. Dell wasn't sure if he should laugh or cry, not that he was about to do either in front of such a bratty, good for nothin' bully. This just wasn't right. Even the stupidest, most pitiful bully, who might or might not have a hidden criminal record, was going after Dell now. This had to stop! Dell waited until class had ended, glad that Scout turned out to be no bigger a distraction than some of the other unruly kids in class, gathered his things quick, and stiffly walked the few feet to Scout's desk. Luckily Greg had bolted for the door as soon as possible so Dell didn't have to explain anything to him. Scout wasn't in much of a hurry to go, propping his feet up on his desk. He had an infuriatingly smug cross between a sneer and a grin on his face as he casually gestured a hand in Dell's direction. “Good. I'm glad to see one o' you eggheads has sense enough to keep my fist out o' dere face before doin' da right t'ing,†Scout said. Dell gritted his teeth as he smiled back. He'd worked on a solution to the problem and he was so confident it'd be a fitting retribution but he knew there would be some backlash when Scout caught on. Still, it'd be worth it in the end. “You want me to do all yer homework?†Dell asked. Scout nodded and shrugged. “I ain't got time,†Scout said, “And I ain't been here in so long...†Some excuse, Dell thought. Whatever Scout had been doing, a little talk with the teachers could probably sort things out and find a way to properly catch the kid up. Dell would have insisted on that, might have even offered to help if the other boy had been nice about it, but Dell didn't feel like being helpful. He wanted to get back at this bully. So he shrugged as well. “How 'm I goin' to get it to ya before school starts?†Dell asked, “If you don't want 'em to recognize my hand-writin', you'll have to copy it down in yers.†Scout snorted but glared pretty hard at Dell for such a simple, sensible question. Dell took a step back. “You're in homeroom wit' me, chucklehead! Didn't ya notice?†Scout asked. Oh. That did make it pretty easy then. Dell felt embarrassed, even if he was pretty sure he shouldn't be. “I mostly notice the folks right around me, is all,†Dell admitted. It was true enough. Scout still looked pissed off but he nodded, accepting it as an apology of sorts. Dell smirked and left Scout to his own devices. The bully had taken the bait, hook, line, and sinker! Scout figured it out faster than Dell had expected. Two days later, Scout cornered him in the hallway while the other students rushed around to get home or to get to their after school activities. Dell had been uneasy the whole time but didn't see Scout coming before he was slammed into the lockers behind him with a clang. This was followed by a punch to the gut that left Dell slumped forward as he tried to catch his breath. “Oof!†“CHRIST! Ya set me up, you numbnuts! Everythin' ya gave me came back as a fuckin' F!†Dell groaned because that was the only sound he could make at the moment. Scout grabbed him by the shoulders and pushed him upright, holding him against the lockers so he could get into Dell's face. No surprise, the guy was snarling worse than a cougar. “I thought you was smart!†Scout snapped, “You could 've made 'em C's if you just wanted to be lazy about it! I wasn't expectin' no fuckin' A's, that would o' tipped 'em off, but Jesus!†Dell regained his composure and just gave Scout a cold, distant look. “Ya never specified my doin' it RIGHT! You just told me to do it, so I did. Deal with it or get someone else to do your dirty work!†Dell said. Scout didn't break eye contact and there was practically a wild gleam in his eye. Dell didn't like it one bit. This bully wasn't just unimpressed and frustrated, he was vicious. He wasn't going to give up just because he'd been thwarted, even though it'd be much easier to just beat Dell up and then bully Greg or someone else into the same situation. “Let me tell ya how dis is goin' down,†Scout said, “You do my homework tonight and ya make it a passin' grade dat I can deal wit' or you better make ya last farewells 'cause tomorrow I'm goin' to get suspended again. Maybe kicked out fo' good. THIS time it'll be fo' plasterin' your useless brains all over da wall!†Oh good lord! This kid was crazy. Dell gulped, remembering what his friends had said before. This stupid, scrawny bully was feared because he was a prison inmate in the makin'. Or maybe that was just what he wanted everyone else to think. Dell simply nodded, since egging him on was a bad idea. Scout shook Dell before letting him go, glared once over his shoulder to let Dell know he wasn't going to forget overnight, then went storming down the hall faster and louder than a cattle stampede. Dell stood there, staring for a minute or two before he regained his usual composure. He needed to find his friends and find out how much of that was boasting, whether they knew for sure or not.
This is very energetic, and the writing is good. Accent wise, you've got most of the dialect sounding good, but scout sounded a bit more... Jamaican in the second chapter, if you know what I mean? I like your pairing of Heavy with Scout, simply because it's unexpected. You're introducing characters as they affect scout, instead of the social importance to scout, which is very nice (if that makes sense). It makes it sound more natural, like a train of thought. The jump from chapter 1 to chapter 2 was a bit much, and maybe needed a little bit of OOC explaining. You've got some unanswered questions, like why Scout is indeed called Scout. He needs to have gotten the nickname from somewhere, and you explain most other names / use cannon names. Simply being called Scout is a little jarring, such as Mr. Mundy referring to him as Scout. Teachers aren't really meant to call kids by nicknames unless requested, and it's usually something like Rob instead of Robert. Overall, what you've got here is really good. The whole Heavy / Scout thing really just tickles a soft place in me and makes me super happy, so kudos for that!
Sorry, you're right. It's a huge jump from that into the back story. The back story is supposed to eventually come back around to the present and pick up right where the first chapter ended as Dell's view of the world up until that point suddenly comes to a grinding halt. That was my plan anyway. It might have been a very bad plan that still should have had some subtle foreshadowing that I totally forgot about. Oops. Let me know if it needs more explaining than that. I'll try to work on Scout's accent. Dropped r's and d's instead of th's are admittedly most of what I know about his accent. Any specific tips would be helpful on improving it. As for Scout, it's his given name in this story (I ran with that because it's easy and I like it so I kept it that way.) It's a really uncommon name but it is sometimes used. The most prominent example I can think of is To Kill a Mockingbird. Sorry, I didn't think that required an explanation which is why I didn't include one. D:
"Like the dutiful and loving son that he was, he gladly complied, but took off like a bat out of hell the minute she let go of him." Is this a contradiction? Can Scout gladly do something but want to get away as soon as he can? I read "like the dutiful and loving son that he was" as being mildly sarcastic, but was it meant that way? I'm enjoying the characterization, particularly Heavy. Also: "He winced as he remembered his next class was in the next building over, across the little covered “bridge†that was built between the two buildings." 2fort reference? You are awesome.
It's number 3 here. As for tips on the accent, I'd suggest looking up accent coaches on youtube, or just try watching some New York based films. This isn't my specific area of expertise, but from a little research on youtube that it's more about exaggerated vowels and relaxed mouths than missing out consonants (I think they're called that?). It'd be hard to phonetically write it down without looking a bit odd, I have to admit; "I'm walking here!" sounds like "Ahm wahlkin' here!" Maybe just stick to lighter accented English? I don't know. I guess I just saw "“Good. I'm glad to see one o' you eggheads has sense enough to keep my fist out o' dere face before doin' da right t'ing,†Scout said." and it all read in a Jamaican accent from there.
Is this a contradiction? Can Scout gladly do something but want to get away as soon as he can? I read "like the dutiful and loving son that he was" as being mildly sarcastic, but was it meant that way? Well, here is the way I meant it to be. Scout has a sense of urgency. His mother was the one who inspired this in him, just a minute ago, by complaining that he'll be late if he doesn't leave right now. He loves his mother and has no qualms showing affection for her but he's annoyed because his mother is interrupting his attempt to do what she told him to do, even if only by a few seconds, when she was the one getting on him about being late in the first place. To him, it feels like she changed her mind all of a sudden, even though she didn't. She just worries about him, as much as she does her other children, and she is worried any one of them might be killed because of the gang violence and other crap in their neighborhood, so she tends to ask for hugs or kisses before they leave. Not every time but frequently enough. In case it's the last time she sees them. I'm sorry I didn't get that across very well. I will try to explain their motivations better next time. I am glad you like the characterizations so far. Yes! 2fort reference for the win! As for Scout's accent, his is specifically supposed to be a Boston accent and those are distinctive from a New York accent. Though I'm sure the voice acting for Scout isn't strictly accurate because if I remember correctly he does kind of slip into more of a Brooklyn/New York sound, to me, in game now and then. Not that that's utterly unrealistic. Accents can blur together in real life, after all, especially if you've been exposed to more than one over a period of time. I guess I'll go back to much lighter accenting until I've got a better feel for it. I didn't think about Youtube! Good idea. Of course, if I had any sense I could probably also listen to the Scout sound clips and get a semi-decent idea too. Either way, I really do appreciate the feedback from both of you. (:
As far as accents go, most of the line 6 wrote out could go both directions, bostonian or jamaican. The one that really makes it sound Jamaican (to me at least) is the "t'ing" at the end. That is a very jamaican trait to drop the "h" in some "th" sounds. Bostonians tend to swap them out for D's or leave them as is I think. They also tend to have a drawled out, back of the throat, "Ar" sound in words like smart, car, department, or park. Don't know how to show that in writing though. Smaart? Carr? Depahrtment? I don't know. Hope it helps though!