1 . Name: Arrugalator @ 2011-07-17 18:51

Uhhh hi. This is my first post, though I've been lurking for a while now. All I've gotta say is that first person is awkward and having friends that overshare this much is ridiculously shitty.

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How’d this whole thing get started? Well-- it wasn’t like some stupid freakin’ romance novel, alright? None of that sappy lady shit with the cowboys and the rich upper class ladies and the-- my ma reads a lot of ‘em, okay?

I guess it’s kinda her fault this all started anyway. Nah, not even hers. It’s that RED Spy that can take the blame. I just freakin’ hate that guy and I dunno what my ma sees in him. Not even just ‘cause he’s RED! I mean if she was all over our Spy? I’d still be fuckin’ pissed about it. Those guys are just creepy. I mean who knows what they’re really like, right? Man, I mean I love my ma but she just can’t pick em. First there was my dad and I hardly remember him. Left when I was five. Bastard. Then there was that mechanic guy that lived down the street--

Off-track my ass! Fine, alright. So I guess I shouldn’t hate that Spy so much ‘cause he’s what got me and Sniper talkin’ in the first place but I don’t care. He’s still a slimy bastard and I ain’t ever gonna like him.

Anyways. So the guy backstabbed me twice in one day this one time, and I mean one time, cause he just got real lucky that day! But y’know, I was real pissed about it, and I kinda just needed to vent about it. And, well, Snipes just happened to be around, and if there’s one thing I know it’s that he hates Spies almost as much as me. And I say almost ‘cause as far as I know the Spy ain’t doin’ anything with his ma. Knowin’ him he probably is, though. Bastard.

I think that was the first time I thought maybe the Sniper wasn’t just really creepy, though. I mean how can ya blame me? He just... watches people all day where nobody can see him, he pisses in jars, and then he goes back to his freakin’ van at night. You tell me that ain’t creepy soundin’. But then after a bit he actually seemed okay. Like, maybe if I went and hung out with him sometime he wouldn’t just gut me and skin my corpse. Not that I can’t handle myself, but I hadn’t ever seen the inside of that van of his then. I dunno, he coulda had anything in there. Australians, man. Ya never really know with them. It’s like they’ve got their own weird secret code language, too. Still don’t know what he means half the time.

The thing is though, when I was talkin’ to him, just kinda goin’ on like I do sometimes, even though he wasn’t really sayin’ a lot (mostly he was just ‘mmhmm’-ing like my ma does) I knew he was listenin’ to me. Which was weird, ‘cause I didn’t really know anyone who actually listened to me. I mean, even now I bet you’re not even really listening to everythin’ I say, right? It was kinda nice though. I mean I’m not some crazy, don’t need a freakin’ shrink or anybody to talk to or nothin’. I did that once when I was a kid, sorta. I was actin’ up in school I guess and so I had to go to the counselor and they asked me lotsa questions about my family like it was gonna make me into a good kid and make me do my homework or somethin’. I dunno where they came up with that idea but--

Why d’ya keep interruptin’ me? I mean ya wanna listen or not? It’s my freakin’ story, I should be able to tell it however the hell I wanna tell it.

So, I dunno. We talked, or I guess I talked a lot and he listened and added in a bit. He stuck around the base longer than he usually did and told me about a couple times he got that stupid Spy really good, but that was about all. I figured he just liked listening more than talkin’, ya know? I like talkin’ more than listenin’ so I didn’t mind. After he left I wasn’t really sure what I thought about it. Just a sorta ‘Huh. That was cool,’ thing I guess. I mean what’d I tell ya? It wasn’t like those stupid girly books, okay? There wasn’t like, fuckin sparks flyin’ and love at first sight, or... whatever. However it’s supposed to go. How would I know? It’s bullshit, anyway.

We didn’t really get to talk a whole lot for a few days after that. Still more than we ever used to, but we were pretty busy. Y’know, one of those weeks where work just kinda takes over all your time? I don’t mind, cause if there’s one guy who gets job satisfaction, it’s me. Livin’ the dream right here. That teacher in high school who said I was gonna be a nobody flippin’ burgers the rest ‘a my life? Well, guess who won that one? And yeah, yeah, I know you’re gonna start whinin’ about how I’m gettin’ off-track again, so calm down, I’m freakin’ gettin’ there. That week wasn’t really that excitin’ or nothin’, but I guess it’s the end of the week where shit got more interestin’.

Everyone was just bein’ so boring that night. I mean sometimes playin’ cards and shit’s alright, but I dunno. Wasn’t really in that kinda mood, ya know? Not even Demo wanted to do anythin’ fun or destructive and that’s just sad. So I figured I’d go for a run, and if Snipes was hangin’ around his van I’d go see what he was up to. By this point I was positive he wasn’t skinnin’ anybody out there at least.

I ran around a bit, didn’t go straight there. I mean, that guy sees everything, right? I didn’t want him to see me runnin’ straight over to see him. That’d be weird. It was a nice night out anyway, warm but not hot and kinda breezy. It felt good, I wasn’t in any rush to get there. Why would I be? It wasn’t even really dark yet or anything either.

When I finally went by Sniper was out sittin’ in the back doorway of his van, havin’ a drink and not lookin’ surprised at all, which means he’d seen me comin’. I really dunno how he sees everything, I mean he’s got squinty little eyes and all. Maybe his sunglasses are all rigged up like binoculars or somethin’, shit, who knows. I slowed down to a walk as I came up to him, givin’ him this big smile so maybe he wouldn’t tell me to just piss off.

“What’re you doin’ runnin’ around out here?” he asked, and I just shrugged and came closer.

“Bored. Everyone’s just sittin’ around and playin’ cards and stuff so I figured I’d go out and run.”

“Hate to break it to ya, mate, but I’m just sittin’ around too.” I didn’t know what I was supposed to say to that! He was kinda right but I wasn’t gonna say somethin’ like I’d rather hang around him than the others ‘cause that just sounded really fuckin’ dumb. I guess I lucked out though, ‘cause I got this dumb look on my face or somethin’ while I tried to think of what to say and he just laughed it off.

“Come in, then. Drink?” He got up and went inside, and I climbed up after him.

“Yeah, um, anything’s good.” So I didn’t really know much about drinks, whatever, alright? I’m not exactly old enough to y’know, legally go do that, and the one time I got some from one of my brothers my ma nearly killed me! She can be a freakin’ monster if she really wants to be. Uh, if ya ever meet her don’t tell her I said that. Then I’d definitely get killed.

Anyway, so this van, like, wasn’t really creepy at all. Kinda messy, but I ain’t exactly the tidy type either. I just sat on this little couch-chair thing and looked around at everything ‘til he turned around and handed me this drink. Well, I ain’t scared of anything so I just took a big gulp of it, right? Bad idea. At least I swallowed it, but he fuckin’ started laughin’ at me again.

“Bit strong for you, then?”

“Hell no! Jeez, who d’ya take me for, huh?”

“A bloody awful liar, for one--”

That was just like, askin’ for a challenge. I wasn’t gonna let him call me a liar. So, I kept drinkin’ that stuff, whatever it was. Burned real bad but I kinda got used to it. And like hell I was gonna stop at one! That’d just be the pussy way out, and I ain’t a pussy. So I kept goin’. A bit slower, but hey, I had to walk all the way back to the base and I wasn’t gonna get ol’ Snipes to freakin’ escort me or somethin’ ‘cause I was fallin’ over!

Neither me or him got real drunk or anythin’, just a little bit. Me maybe a little more. That doesn’t make me a lightweight, alright? Anyways, we just talked about all sorts ‘a stuff, like work and guns and where we were from and all that shit. Pretty lighthearted crap, ya know? Well, then I brought up family and everything got all weird.

“Seven of em, then me. I think my ma was just really hopin’ for a girl every time. If I was her I woulda stopped a long time before eight. You got any siblings?”

“Nah.”

“See! Your parents are smart. Er... Parents? Parent? Shit, ya weren’t raised by kangaroos were ya?” He just chuckled at me. I thought if people here can get raised by wolves kangaroos can’t be that weird there, right?

“I have parents. Human ones.”

“Well that’s lucky, ‘cause I only got the one. I dunno where my dad went. Nobody does, or at least nobody’s tellin’ me. My ma says he’s a loser but I still wish I knew him, ya know?”

“Mm. I think maybe it’s best to have one good parent instead of having the bad one around. Last thing a kid needs is a shit dad around to make things worse.”

I kinda got the feeling he was speakin’ from experience, but I just nodded and finished my drink. I felt funny, like I kept starin’ at him and crap. I was just drunk enough to think he wouldn’t really notice, except he notices everything so that was kinda dumb.

It was a good thing he basically shooed me off when he did, ‘cause part of me just really wanted to kiss him. And I swear to God, you tell anyone or you ever call me a fag, I’ll fuckin’ bash your brains in. Just ‘cause I don’t care too much about girls don’t make me a girl. Got it?

But, uh, I’d never done that with another guy before or nothin’ and I wasn’t really sure that it was a good idea to start then. I mean not like I couldn’t get any guy I wanted, ya know, but I didn’t exactly grow up in Beacon Hill, alright? If anybody where I grew up would ‘a known that I was-- ya know-- I’d be freakin’ on death row or somethin’.

Jeez-- what’cha in such a rush for? Can’t even tell my own freakin’ story. I know ya wanna get to the dirty parts, creep, but if ya wanted that maybe you should’a got one of those books ya got in your room. They skip right to the good parts.

Anyways, I didn’t know what to do but then he said I should go back to the base and he had that sorta look on his face that said he was tellin’ me, not just suggestin’. I figured he wouldn’t tell me to go away if he was in the mood for makin’ out and I didn’t wanna get thrown out on my ass either for tryin’, so I just headed back to the base so quiet I’d make the Spy look like a freakin’ amateur at his own game.

Next day was a day off. Well, they’re not exactly a day off ‘cause there’s always stuff to do but close enough ‘cause we’re not runnin’ around killin’ anybody. Solly still screams at everybody to get up at the crack ‘a dawn anyway, not like most of us listen. Most of the time I’ll get up ‘cause I like goin’ for a run in the morning but that day I swear my skull was vibratin’ every time he yelled another word at me. I mean not really ‘cause I was hung over or nothin’ but when I got back to base that night I just kinda laid there and thought. My ma’d say otherwise but I think a lot. If I’m not talkin’ I’m thinkin’ and I think louder than I talk. Aw, shut up, it’s true! Once I start thinkin’ about something I can’t stop.

Don’t gimme that look, asshole. Just ‘cause I was thinkin’ about the guy doesn’t mean I’m turnin’ soft or nothin’, alright? I mean I bet he was doin’ the exact same thing, alright? Probably why he kicked me out in the first place. I was just humourin’ myself, really, just dumb ideas like thinkin’ maybe he liked guys just as much as I did. Stuff like that, not dumbass cutesy stuff, okay? I didn’t have like, a-- a crush or nothin’ like that! What was I talkin’ about anyway?

Day off. Okay. Yeah, so I slept in way too late ‘cause eventually I just got too tired to think but unfortunately that was only a couple hours before the human freakin’ alarm clock started marchin’ down the hall. I figured I’d just run later and deal with gettin’ yelled at for bein’ a lazy maggot when I did. When I finally got up it was pretty quiet, meanin’ everyone had gone off to do their own thing. Didn’t matter much to me.

I got up to go to the kitchen- I doubted there was anythin’ left but found a couple waffles. That’s not the important part though. The important part is that somebody was on the phone in the next room and it didn’t sound too good. I dunno about you but I’ve heard some pretty freakin’ funny phone calls in here sometimes, so I try and listen in on ‘em when I hear ‘em. ‘Cept this one wasn’t that funny at all.

I couldn’t really tell for a second ‘cause the door was closed but then I could hear it was Sniper, and... well I was curious, so I moved to the door and listened real close. Nobody was around, so... Don’t tell me you wouldn’t do the same! Besides, I needed to know if he had some kinda wife or somethin’ ‘cause I wasn’t gonna put the moves on him if he had some crocodile lady back in Australia who’d probably rip me in half if she could get close enough. I’ve seen what people do when they get cheated on, man. I swear if my ma didn’t have us to look after she’d probably be in jail for doin’ somethin’ by now. Like, y’know. Homicide.

Anyway, standin’ right by the door I could hear the conversation pretty well and it wasn’t too pleasant. Still, even after a while I couldn’t tell who exactly who he was talkin’ to either, but whoever it was things didn’t sound too good with ‘em.

“Listen, Dad, I don’t know what exactly you expect, but I’m not-- Dad-- oh for fuck’s sake!”

Yeah, remember when I said I figured Sniper was speakin’ from experience? Yeah, I was totally right on that one. The conversation didn’t last too long after that. Then things got even worse ‘cause somehow he hung up the phone and opened the door within like, a second, right? So I didn’t really get to move that far from the door. It was pretty obvious that I’d been there.

“Hey, uh, I was just waitin’ for ya to get off the pho---”

“You’re still a shit liar, you know that?”

I tried to explain-- well, sort of. I couldn’t tell him the truth, that’d just be too fuckin’ weird. I knew I had to do somethin’, though. I just didn’t really know what. I mean it’s not like I could ask any of the guys for freakin’ advice or anythin’, then they’d know and then-- Well you’re hardly listenin’ now, why would I tell you?

So I called my ma. Not for advice! Shit, that’s the last thing I need. She’d think I like some lady and then she’d ask that friggin’ Spy about it and then he’d tell her there’s no girls on the team and... you get the point. I just called her ‘cause if I don’t she gets all worried and that’s even worse. Plus, then at least I wasn’t totally lying to Snipes.

The only thing I really figured I could do was apologize. And that was just a shitty conclusion to come to ‘cause I really, really suck at apologizin’ for anything. Mostly ‘cause when I do somethin’? I don’t regret it! This, though, I kinda regretted. I regretted gettin’ caught, mostly. But really, I don’t ever bother apologizin’. I did when I was a kid but only when my ma forced me and that wasn’t really sincere or anythin’ either. Mostly gettin’ dragged over to the neighbors’ place to apologize for breakin’ their windows and stuff. This was a bit more serious, ya know? Mostly ‘cause I cared a lot more about this than some dumb window.

So I waited. And thought. And got a snack. And thought some more. I mean how do ya apologize to someone and make it sound sincere? Especially when you’re me and nothin’ really sounds sincere? I guess I’m askin’ the wrong person, huh?

I waited for that night, ‘cause I figured with the way he left the base he didn’t really wanna see anybody for a while. I would’a waited longer but even waitin’ til night was long enough for me to get all nervous and shit. After that I just wanted to get it all out and over with, ya know?

Everyone seemed to freakin’ need to talk to me at once that night so it was pretty late by the time I headed out. I kinda wondered if he’d even be awake, but I needed to check anyway. Besides, even if it was late, I thought I wouldn’t be long anyway. Say I’m sorry, chat a minute maybe, go back to base and sleep easy. Not fuckin’ quite, man!

So I got there, and the lights were on which was a good sign, but he wasn’t outside this time so I actually had to y’know, go up and knock. I mean it sounds easy, but shit, I didn’t know how he was gonna react, man! I should get a friggin’ medal for that one. It took me a minute but I went up to the door and knocked pretty loud. I could hear him gettin’ up and walkin’ around inside and I dunno if that made me feel better or worse.

Then he opened the door and I had a fuckin’ gun in my face! I mean I guess a guy can’t be too careful around here, but jeez!

“Woah woah woah-- it’s just me!” The last thing I wanted to do right then was find out respawn didn’t work out there, alright? He put his rifle down after that, though. Thankfully. He looked really freakin’ creepy, way taller since he was up in the van and I was standin’ on the ground, and he just stared down at me for what felt like forever.

“What’re you doin’ out here, Scout?” His voice was all low and shit, I kinda forgot to say anythin’ for a second.

“I just uh- I wanted to uh-- can I come in for a minute?” He gave me this weird look then moved outta the doorway so I could get inside. It was pretty freakin’ awkward for a minute there, man. He just stared at me until I finally started talkin’.

“Look, uh--” It’s hard to concentrate when he’s lookin’ at me like that, alright? “About earlier, uh, sorry about that.” Real friggin’ smooth, huh? Shit. His face changed a little though, like he wasn’t quite so pissed off, and he sat down.

“S’all right. Just wasn’t expectin’ anyone creepin’ around. Can’t have been the worst thing anyone’s ever overheard ‘round here.” I snorted and sat down beside him.

“Not even freakin’ close, man! Ya ever go to make breakfast when Soldier’s on the phone? It’s not even like you can try and ignore that.” Then Sniper actually laughed. Felt a bit better after that.

“Guess we’ve both got shitty dads, huh? Shit, I mean I thought you were talkin’ to your wife or somethin’.” See how I snuck that one in there? I’m freakin’ good.

“Mate, if I had a wife and we fought like that she wouldn’t be my wife much longer.” No crocodile lady, man! I was set! Except I had to y’know, catch his interest. And... I’m not really good at the whole subtlety thing, so I kinda just nodded and sat there thinkin’ about how maybe I could give him a hint or somethin’.

“That all you wanted?” he asked. At that point, I took about two seconds to think- what’s the worst that could happen? Pretty sure if I fucked it up I could make some excuse for it. Doc put me on some new meds, made me all weird, somethin’ like that.

So I just went for it. I friggin’ grabbed him by the shoulders and kissed him. Not real hard or anythin’ but I wasn’t real girly and gentle about it either. I thought for sure he was gonna throw me out after that, but he didn’t. He pulled me closer, puttin’ his hands on the sides ‘a my head, knockin’ my hat off onto the floor. It was kinda weird at first, kissin’ a guy, ‘cause even though I don’t really like girls I at least kissed ‘em before. Girls don’t have stubble or rough hands or any of that stuff, but as soon as I kissed him I knew I was definitely queer. Which kinda sucks, ‘cause I guess I’ll have to tell ma at some point, but hey, I didn’t really care at the time.

Then he pulled me up into his lap, his hands grabbin’ at my hips, and to tell ya the truth I had no idea how far this was gonna go but I didn’t wanna stop. He’s a real good kisser too. I dunno, guess I didn’t expect that ‘cause who expects the loner dude to be the best kisser, right? Not that I thought about it before then. Don’t tell me ya never thought about it! Then he started untuckin’ my shirt and his hands were all calloused and stuff against my back and shit it felt nice. ‘cept I was getting a little nervous, y’know, just a little tiny, tiny bit. Not much at all! But he could tell, I told ya he notices everythin’!

“You haven’t done this before, have you?” he asked, but it was more like he was tellin’ me more than askin’ me. I tried to think of somethin’ clever to say but nothin’ really came to mind.

“...No, but--” I could tell he was pullin’ away a little, so I ground my hips down against his and leaned in real close. “--I wanna.” Was I gonna throw away this kinda opportunity? Hell. No. I could hear his breath hitch, his hand get tighter on my hip.

“You’re sure about this?” He’d taken off his sunglasses, and it was the first time I ever really got a good look at him without ‘em. I’m a sucker for nice eyes, alright? His are kinda this grey-blue colour, real nice but nobody ever sees ‘em. Shame.

“Yeah! Why wouldn’t I be?” I gave him this big grin to try and convince him I was just fine, even though I was still a little nervous. Just a little. He chuckled.

“You’re shakin’, that’s why.” Okay, maybe I was shakin’ a little but not that bad, I swear! Still, uh, was nice of him and all, bein’ so gentlemanly about it. “You can say no, mate.” I mean jeez, I didn’t really expect that. Not complainin’.

“I’m fine, man, just-- uh, never done nothin’ like this is all. But I wanna, alright, if I didn’t I’d freakin’ leave! So, uh...” I guess I convinced him ‘cause he smiled at me and then his mouth was on mine again and we went right back to where we were before til he nudged me off so we could move over to the bed.

He’s got a really nice bed. Like, it’s no wonder he doesn’t wanna stay in the base. Seriously.

But it wasn’t like we just went on the bed and got straight at it, ya know? He was takin’ his time, which ain’t somethin’ I do often but he made it worth it, kissin’ me all slow and stuff, his hands all over me and mine on him. I didn’t even wanna rush it. Finally he started like, kissin’ down my jaw and my neck and stuff, and once he started usin’ teeth I lost a lotta my patience.

...Got your attention, didn’t I? Yeah, thought so! Creep.

I slid outta my shirt and started grabbin’ at his, which he got out of pretty quick after that. He’s got a lotta scars. I mean I’ve got a few big ones but he’s got lots. I followed ‘em with my fingers, mostly just likin’ the way his skin felt against my hands. I’ve never been really touchy-feely or nothin’ but somehow I found myself feelin’ differently now.

I started unbucklin’ my belt and shovin’ my pants down, not really sure when I got rid of my shoes or socks but they were gone too. It was kinda embarrassin’ how hard I was already, real obvious through my underwear once I got my pants off. Snipes didn’t seem to mind, though, watchin’ me as he slowly kept undressin’ himself. What can I say, man, I’m a pretty damn good sight to see. So’s he, though. I dunno how he gets it since he like, sits around waitin’ to shoot people all day, but he’s like, all lean muscle and goddamn, he’s got like, wicked long legs. And he’s got like, hair, but not like he’s a fuckin’ walkin’ carpet or somethin’. Just nice.

Anyways, I got outta my underwear too so I was totally naked. I’m not shy about that kinda stuff cause I don’t got any reason to be. I was just fuckin’ dyin’ in anticipation, ya know? Then finally he gets out of all his clothes and like, holy shit, man. I didn’t think that thing was gonna fit in me. I mean that’s a normal worry ain’t it?

So I pretty much pounced on him after that, rubbin’ up against him, whisperin’ all this dirty stuff in his ear, all the things I could think of. I could feel his cock pressin’ up against my skin which was really, really weird at first. I mean I never felt another guy’s dick before! Even weirder was when I actually reached down and started jackin’ him off all slow. Just somethin’ that’s kinda surreal I guess. He really liked it, anyway, judgin’ by the way he fuckin’ growled at me.

He moved away so he could reach in the drawer by his bed, gettin’ a bottle of lube which was a huge friggin’ relief for me. Still, I mean-- the idea of it was still real intimidatin’. I leaned back on my elbows on the bed, watchin’ him as he opened the little bottle, pourin’ the stuff all over his fingers. Holy shit, right?

“You still alright with this?” he asked. Like hell I was backin’ out on this. It’d have to be real fuckin’ unpleasant for me to say no now.

“Yeah! Just, uh, be careful, alright?” I mean it was gonna be pretty obvious the next day if he hurt me real bad or anything, and that was the last freakin’ thing I needed. He smiled, though, pattin’ my leg with the hand he hadn’t lubed up. I spread my legs so he could kneel between ‘em, practically holdin’ my breath as I felt his fingers pressin’ against me.

“Just relax.” So like, everythin’ I said felt weird earlier? Nothin’ fucking compared to how weird it felt when he started pressin’ his finger in there. Like... It didn’t hurt real bad or anythin’ but it wasn’t exactly comfy either. I let out my breath and closed my eyes, lettin’ him push another one in there. That was even worse, especially when he started movin’ ‘em around.

I thought for sure there was no freakin’ way this was ever gonna feel good and I was kinda gettin’ impatient. Then he did somethin’ fuckin’ crazy with his fingers and all of a sudden I felt fuckin’ amazing, man. Holy shit, like I couldn’t even see straight and every time he did it I couldn’t even help it, I just couldn’t keep quiet. Like, thank fuckin’ God we were out in his van ‘cause the walls at the base are like fuckin’ paper. Have you ever walked past the-- yeah, nasty to listen to ain’t it? That’s why I play the radio at night by my bed ‘cause if I didn’t, man, I’d never sleep. ‘Cept sometimes ya can’t get good reception out there and then I’m just totally screwed. Anyway, pretty sure I was even louder than that.

Kinda started to hurt when he slid in a third but man, I didn’t even care anymore. It hurt but it felt good at the same time, ya know? ...No? Well, believe me, it’s like that. If you did it you’d know. Anyways, he kept stretchin’ me open and hittin’ that spot and fuck, I wanted more. I grabbed him by the shoulders and started kissin’ him again, nothin’ gentle about it though. He got the hint and pulled his fingers out and started strokin’ his cock and gettin’ it all slicked up. His other hand was on my thigh, rubbin’ circles on it with his thumb. I gave him this look like ‘get on with it already’ ‘cause seriously, I was goin’ crazy down there.

Felt like forever but finally I felt his dick pressin’ up against me, then slowly, slowly he started pushin’ forward, and all I could feel was the stretch and the burn of it. I couldn’t keep quiet, fuckin’ pantin’ for it and diggin’ my nails in his skin. I wanted to close my eyes but I couldn’t stop watchin’ his face. He just looked like he was in total bliss and he was sayin’ somethin’ about how tight I was, how hot. He didn’t even move for a bit, we just stayed still while he let me get used to how it felt.

“Keep goin’,” I mumbled, once it stopped hurtin’ so much. He started movin’ his hips again, and all I could think was how loud everything sounded. The sounds I was makin’, the sounds he was makin’. I know it’s weird, but that’s all I could focus on. Everythin’ else was just kinda makin’ my head swim. It fuckin’ hurt but it felt so fuckin’ good at the same time-- I mean I’m not some crazy pain junkie or nothin’ but this was different, man.

It started gettin’ so that I was askin’ him to go faster, to go harder. I mean I’ve been told your first time isn’t supposed to be all rough and crazy and shit but whatever man, mine totally was. I fuckin’ loved that. And once he started hittin’ that spot again? Christ, I couldn’t keep my freakin’ mouth shut. He lifted my legs up-- so he could get a better angle-- and just started fucking. All that crap about bein’ nervous and bein’ careful and all? All gone in no time flat, man. I swear it’s the truth! ...Fuckin’ lemme tell my story. Asshole.

By that time I was gettin’ real close. I mean jeez, I dunno how I even lasted that long without creamin’ myself, it was that good. So I grabbed him by the shoulder and pulled him in real close so I could kiss him again, my teeth hittin’ against his and pantin’ against each other’s mouths and crap. I reached down and wrapped my hand around my dick and after that it was all over, man. I came so fuckin’ hard I was seein’ stars. While I was tryin’ to catch my breath I watched Snipes, who just kept goin’ for a few seconds after me, his hands grabbin’ my thighs so hard I had bruises the next day. I must’ve broke the skin ‘cause his lip was bleedin’, but by the looks of it he didn’t care. It barely took any time after me for him to come, though, swearin’ and groanin’ when he did. Shit, it was hot just watchin’ him.

He took a few deep breaths before he pulled outta me, which really friggin’ made me squirm around. Jizz leakin’ outta you is just not a good feelin’, man, trust me. Totally made up for it though-- he did the weirdest fuckin’ thing. I was lyin’ back, right, just tryin’ to figure everythin’ that just happened out, right? And then-- get this-- he fuckin’ hikes my legs up over his shoulders and leans down and starts lickin’ me clean. And that sounds so fuckin’ weird, right? But holy fuckin’ shit it felt good. My legs were shakin’ after that, and if I wasn’t so tired I probably woulda been ready to go again.

He let me put my legs down after that and rolled onto the bed beside me, watchin’ me real close just like always. I was kinda just speechless, which doesn’t happen much. I just dunno what you’re supposed to say after ya go at it, y’know?

“How was that, then?” He broke the silence, which I wasn’t expectin’ at all.

“Uh, wicked awesome!” I grinned, hardly able to keep my eyes open.

“Didn’t think ya had it in you, really.”

“The hell’s that supposed to mean? Ya think I’m a wimp or somethin’?”

“I’m just sayin’ you like it a lot rougher than I expected.” He chuckled and ruffled my hair, and I gave him the best glare I could for havin’ not a lot of energy left.

“I don’t think ya get to talk about what ya expected when you’re the one who just licked my ass, alright?” I watched him as he got up to go hit the lights.

“And ya weren’t complainin’ about it either. Now-- if ya want to leave go ahead, but you’re welcome to stay.” I wanted to leave just ‘cause I didn’t wanna have to sneak back to base in the morning and have a buncha questions asked, but I was also fuckin’ exhausted. I mean I didn’t sleep much the night before and I just got my brains fucked out, so...

“I’ll stay.” He smiled and turned out the light before movin’ back to the bed. Pulled me nice and close, and I mean I’m not really a cuddly type, I swear, but... Aw shut up! Just ‘cause nobody wants to freakin’ cuddle you, man! Doesn’t make me a pussy. Sheesh.

“I was hopin’ you would.” I fell asleep right after that. It was nice, bein’ out where it’s quiet instead of the base and havin’ someone to keep ya warm for once. Say whatcha want, man, but I think you’re just jealous.

The morning after was freakin’ stupid, though. Just ‘cause I had to sneak back into the base real early so nobody would see me and then I was runnin’ funny all day and man, that hurt. Was it worth it though? Hell yeah!

That’s it for that story, though. I mean lots ‘a stuff’s happened since then, that was months ago, but I ain’t gonna tell ya everything. That’s like, our private business, ya know? I mean I know ya won’t tell anyone this, but that’s just ‘cause you’re you, mostly. I don’t gotta worry about that with you. All I’m gonna say is life is freakin’ good, man.

...Hey--

...Have you even been fuckin’ payin’ attention to me?