I too figured I should make a one-shot/short story thread where they are all in one place! I'll re-post my old ones later, but I am starting with a new one inspired by some art by Desole. Spy x Director (Hand Kink fic) (As inspired by: http://donc-desole.tumblr.com/post/29914896494/lithefider-i-got-inspired-and-wrote-a-little ) ... “No no, do not just put the subject in the center! Think of the rule of thirds...†The director fussed. Teaching the BLU Spy artistic photography was harder then he thought. “Don’t you have a lot of experience in espionage photos or something?†“For zhat we DO want ze subject in ze center,†The Spy grumbled, glancing up briefly from the viewfinder of the tripod mounted camera. The Director bit his lip, and placed his hands over the Frenchman’s, angling the shot for him, “Here, like this,†He placed his head right up next to his, looking through the viewfinder halfway. The Spy’s balaclava was so warm; he always wondered how he didn’t die in that thing in this western heat…though now the sun was dipping low. “ ‘appy now, monsieur?†The Spy fussed right back. The Director did not move his hands, instead fingering slowly over his pupil’s knuckles, adjusting, “Oui, this shot looks good now.†*CLICK* Then Spy went to wind the film, but their fingers collided as both tried to at once. “I thought I was taking ze photos?†The Spy captured the taller man’s finger, then wound the film himself. The Director paused and nearly gasped, huffing, “If only you could take some good ones! You have no artistic eye!†“So critical, is zhat a trait shared by all directors?†The spy teased, eyes mischievous, as he entwined more fingers of the other’s hand, his thumb and forefinger stroking in a light massage. Why must he do that!? It distracted him so much…devious bastard spy, and he knew it. His gloves were so thin and soft, broken in from years of work, the seams worn down to smooth ridges and almost integrated fully with the leather itself on the outside. His fingers were so purposeful as he grasped at his wrist from underneath, stroking at the tender underbelly with a ghosting touch. “We should line up the next shot before the sun sets...you’re losing the light,†The Director fussed, but his tone was weakening. He was no longer focused on the viewfinder, or even what would be a good next shot. There was only the tingling sensation sweeping down his arm as the Spy entwined all their fingers and turned around to face him. “Your face hides nozzhing,†The Spy grinned surreptitiously, knowing the Director couldn’t resist him. He had him wrapped around his pinky like a string. There was a quick squeeze from his hand, and the other gasped, biting his lip. “Is this what you want?†The BLU licked his own lips, tongue dangerously close to their clasped fingers. “A...ahh...yes,†The older man was under his spell. He wanted it...’yes please, do it…stop teasing me, you started this,’ He thought. “Yes what?†Such a terrible troll he was. He parted his lips and breathed hotly over those digits. His prey trembled. “Please...†The Director tried again, looking more desperate. An un-shy hand stroked down over the begging man’s crotch. An erection was welling there - oh yes he DID want it. He only got more whimpers as that gloved hand stroked through the fabric. “You must tell me what you want, Mon Ami.†A devious face coaxed him, before planting a soft kiss to the other’s finger tips. Hot, his breath was so hot…the Director trembled, “Your tongue, please...†More impish grinning, but the devil’s mouth parted, and a hot tongue slinked out, licking carefully across the other man’s finger pads, back across the first knuckles, then pausing at the last index finger to mouth slightly. Slow, purposeful, experienced. “NNNggggg!†The Director bit his lip more, and pressed into that hand over his groin. His whole body fell on the Spy, weakening under the sensation, “God...more...please...†“You are such a slut for this,†The Spy chuckled, thoroughly amused. “Is this what you want?†He licked out his tongue along the underside of the other’s index finger, and then engulfed with his mouth, eyes not leaving his face. “Yes!†The Director moaned in confirmation, bucking into him wanting more. “You want me to suck you off, oui? Dirty dirty,†The Spy moved his hand momentarily from his crotch to stroke that glove over the older man’s face and lips. A lidded expression kissed and mouthed desperately at his hand, face nuzzling into its soft leather palm. With mostly closed eyes the Director licked softly at the leather. He begged for the Spy to do more, “Yes, please...your tongue is so delicious,†- ‘Hot...wet...’ he thought. “Mmmm,†The Frenchman mused, then lifted up the other’s hand, and gave a long lick from palm to finger tip – where he softly mouthed and nibbled. Lips were pressed to that tender flesh as his tongue flicked from inside his parted mouth, teasing his index and middle fingers together like they were a wanting cock head. “Ahh ahhh!†The Director pressed more firmly, their clothed groins meeting, burgeoning erections begging to be let free. The Spy used his free hand to suddenly shove right down the darkly clothed man’s pants, leather gripping over the erect flesh and giving it a squeeze. The Director cried out half in pain and half in need. 'Un-zip my pants already!' - he was thinking. He’d do it himself but the Spy was now sucking on his fingers with relish. Finally he was given relief, as both their flys’ were undone. The Spy’s finely gloved hand grasped both of them and squeezed. He’d need lubrication to finish them off though…good as the leather felt to the spongy flesh. The Director watched, arousal pumping through his bloodstream, as the Spy used his teeth to take off that one glove. It was tight as it could possibly get, the hand underneath lightly lined with indents where the seams had been pressing into his skin. The director did not have long to admire the lovely digits - as they were shoved into his mouth. He moaned, begging for more, taking them greedily. “Nice and wet, zhat’s eet...†The BLU crooned, now putting all five finger tips into the man’s open mouth. The Director’s tongue flicked wetly over them between moans. Satisfied – the hand trailed off the lips and down to their cocks. Gripped together, the Spy jerked them both off, pre-cum oozing out to aid a bit in the process. As he pumped he sucked off the Director’s long fingers in time, tongue pressing to the fleshy pads with suction. “Ahhh ahhhhhhh!!†The Director was putty in his capable hands, and he came hard – the Spy came soon after. Semen dripped down the Spy’s damp fingers and both of them caught their breaths as their orgasms ebbed. The limp hand was taken up by the older man…who cleaned up the mess like he couldn’t get enough. *CLICK* The Director looked up seeing the lens in his face. The Spy had grabbed it off the tripod with his free hand. “Now THERE is ze shot I was looking for. Très Bon.â€
Ha ha ha yes! Yes, oh yes. This is -- yes. This is hot. Thank you.
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“Respawn Bloody Glitched!†(Sniper / Spy) Basic summary: Sniper has a re-spawn glitch that mixes with some of Miss Pauling’s pattern, resulting in him, with a vagina. (Everything else is male). Exploration, things with Spy, and lols ensue. If this rustles your gender jimmies I highly recommend TeratoMarty’s fic Detachable Sniper too (google it), which is the same general idea, though I actually had not read it all before writing mine. Enjoy! … “So doc…tell it to me straight, how bad is it?†“For all intents and purposes Herr, you have a perfectly normal vagina!†The RED medic bit his lip and held back a laugh of excited curiosity. How scientifically fascinating this was! The Sniper wasn’t sure he liked how…keyed up the doc seemed by this examination. He inched his hairy thighs back together, not liking how empty things felt between them. “That’s…great doc. But can ya fix it?!†“Heh, vhell, this is a little out of my jurisdiction. But I can assume that it mixed your respawn bio-patterns with that of a woman’s. A glitch. Zie only woman I know of who comes to zie base being Miss Pauling. So ja, it could have happened, as her data is in zie system.†“Yer’callin this a GLITCH? This is more then a little ‘glitch’!†The Sniper gestured to his exposed nethers. “Calm yourself Herr, I am sure they can fix it.†He patted the man’s leg. “They better.†The Aussie growled, grabbing his amber glasses and putting them on, while snapping his legs together away from the medic. “I’ll call in a work order, so one of zie next times you respawn, all shall be normal again.†He backed off, chuckling at the man’s expression at him as he jumped down off the exam table. “Herr I know this is distressing. But think of zie scientific possibilities!†“Excuse me?†The sniper gasped, stopping mid pull of his pants up his legs. “You…you could write an article on zie differences of sexual experience between men and women! No man or woman in history has been able to really experience vhat zie other does! Zie insight, you must write it down for me,†He fumbled into his desk for a new notepad. “N…no bloody way! I am not doing ANYTHING till I got me dick back! And I certainly aren’t writing it down for yah even if I did!†He gawked, pulling up his briefs and pants, buckling them securely in a quick motion. “Herr! Bitte, it’s for science!†Medic gestured the pad in his direction. “I told ya no! Criokey!†He shyed away from the pad like it was made of bees, grabbing for his hat instead. “Fine have it your vhay,†The medic sighed in disappointment, slumping in his shirtsleeves. He twisted up his face and then added, “Not even some little masturbation notes? †“I’M LEAVING NOW.†The sniper planted the hat on his head and snatched up his gun, getting the hell out of the infirmary before the doc was offering to do OTHER things for ‘science’. … He tried to look like nothing was out of the ordinary…just walking back to his bunk, yea…nothing to see here. The Sniper had his hat low over his face, covering his eyes to team mates he walked past. Much as he thought he somehow had a neon ‘VAGINA’ sign across his forehead, really nothing looked different to the casual observer. No one was the wiser as he walked by. He darted into the bathroom on his way to his destination, and out of complete autopilot stood in front of the urinal. It took him only a second to remember ‘SHIT’ and snarl at himself. Thankfully the bathroom was empty besides himself. The Aussie looked at the one actual working stall and grimaced as went for it. ‘Bloody ‘ell,†He mumbled to himself, back on his way for his quarters now. That felt weird and he wanted that work order to go through faster then ever. His gun was lovingly placed on the bed before he sat down next to it. In the heat of the late summer like this he usually would strip naked and laze about doing stretches and cleaning his gun before dinner. But the thought of being naked and having to see himself …it was downright unnatural. He looked down at his casually spread legs. He squeezed them together, then let them splay out again. He snarled and flopped his back to the bed. Wrong, it felt so WRONG. What he didn’t want to admit (especially after the Medic’s overzealous reaction) is he WAS curious, wrong as it felt, he did kind of want to…experiment. He’d always been comfortable with his body, and the fact he wasn’t comfortable with a part of it right now was a big part of what was MAKING him uncomfortable. And god forbid…if they could not fix it. He’d have to get used to …it. This didn’t make him a woman, no, not by ANY stretch. He was a man, no matter what was between his legs. “Bloody technology,†He cursed in a mumble, not moving from his limp position on the bed. “Tough day Cher?†A smooth voice rolled over the Sniper’s ears, causing the on edge Aussie to jump up. From the side of the bed uncloaked a shimmer of RED pinstripes. Their team’s spy, and his unconventional lover. “Spoi! Don’t sneak in loike that, I told ya!†He gasped, catching his breath. The Frenchie had GREAT timing to want to make a house call. “And I’m not in the mood today, alrioght? You might as well git.†He shyed away from the Spy, going for his gun like he intended to go clean it like the usual routine. “So testy,†The Spy tutted, taking a drag on his cigarette. Sure, the Sniper had kicked him out before, but that was before they got close, before they were lovers. He sometimes played ‘hard to get’, but this…he seemed, off somehow. The Spy continued teasing him as he crawled onto the bed, ignoring the rejection, he wanted to know what was wrong, “I saw you get blown to bits by ze BLU’s Solider, found you up in your nest, oui? Do not worry, ‘appens to ze best of us. Shake eet off,†Fuck, least he doesn’t KNOW, the Sniper thought. He intended to keep it that way, until this was fixed. But could he hold off the Spy that LONG? His sexual appetite was insatiable when he wanted it. “It’s nothin’, I’ll get the bastard tomorrow. Just not in th’ mood is all.†“Not in the MOOD? You’re always in ze mood.†The Spy crooned, flopping onto the lanky Sniper’s shoulders from behind and digging hands into his open shirt to pet at his chest hair in little swirls. “I told ya, piss off!†The Sniper snapped, shrugging the Spy off him. The more he was rejected the more the Spy was curious, and worried, “Cher, don’t be like that…†He smirked, voice still smarmy. He oozed back onto the Sniper, coming at him from the front this time, standing next to the bed. “Piss…the fuck…off.†Sniper reinstated. His tone was not angry though, more conflicted. Spy just heard tension that could use some taming. He’d been like this before. Pissy, when all he needed was tense muscles rubbed and a mouth over his cock, “Non, come Cher, how about a naked backrub?†He said as he skillfully undid his belt and pants button with the swiftness he could crack a safe or pick handcuffs. In the same motion he yanked at the pants, pulling them down halfway before the Sniper tensed and froze. Froze like deer in the headlights. The Spy was staring at his relatively tight briefs, his usual fare, but something was…missing. There was a considerable amount of bulk absent were it ought to be. “Are you…TUCKING?†Spy said with confusion. “Wh- NO. I told you, PISS OFF ya mongrel!†He kicked the Spy in the gut as he got over the shock, and scrambled to pull his pants up. “What is WRONG with you?!†The spy groaned, staggering then flopping to sit on the bed. He rubbed at his abdomen where he was struck. His tone was angry for the kick, but it also held worry, as did his face. Shit, fuck…he really couldn’t hide this from Spy now could he? But if Spy knew he - wouldn’t he treat him different? Like a lady, and not like a man? Would he just assume he would let him fuck him like it was no big deal? (More then they already DID, but this was different.) “Look, mate…†The Sniper groaned, rubbing his face, “Can you keep a secret?†Much as he didn’t want to admit it, the man he trusted with the most things on that base WAS the Spy. “Secrets are my line of work Monsieur,†He snorted like that was a dumb question. “I mean it. NO one can know. It’s only temporary anyway.†Sniper was very serious. The Spy tilted his head, raising an eyebrow. “Get on with eet, what are you getting at?†The sniper got up and fully dropped his drawers, kicking them to the side. He then slowly pulled the briefs down, just enough, to reveal what was there, more so, what was missing. The Spy initially assumed he was tucking again, but…upon a second look – no. It couldn’t be. “W…what?†The Spy nearly dropped his cig from his mouth. “Respawn, it glitched – completely not in my control.†The Sniper flushed with anger and embarrassment. “Doc said they could fix it soon, just gotta re-program things loike they oughta be or somethin’…†“So that really is – Mon dieu!†The spy came in to examine more closely. His hand was smacked away, “You are not gettin’ bloody well near that.†“You ‘ave a VAGINA and I can’t look at eet?†The Spy smiled wide, “OH Mon Cher, the things I could DO to you! You would LOVE eet…! Women are so sensitive - †“I am NOT a sodding woman!†Sniper snapped loudly at him, grabbing his kukuri and brandishing it at him, “And don’t you EVER mention that in front of me again or I’ll cut ya in two and you’ll never be welcome in me nest again!†The Spy threw his hands up, grimacing with wide eyes, “Sacre Blu! Alright, alright…calm yourself, I did not mean eet that way, MON CHER….†He reinstated showing he was still using the male version of that, “Now put that thing down!†The Australian growled and put away his knife, hunching back down onto the bed with a tired expression, still quite pantsless. There was a sense of relief to tell him. Spy smiled at him, “You want to borrow some of my panties?†“I’m going to murder you in your sleep.†Sniper didn’t miss a beat. … Despite being a joking troll, Spy kept his word and did not go near the Sniper’s altered anatomy again that night, so the Sniper let him stay. He stayed over like he had many other nights, Sniper didn’t say it, but it was obvious he could use the warm body next to him; a comforting spooning partner. And acceptance from your lover was the most comfort of all, in a situation like this. He almost forgot about his ‘problem’ when he woke up the next morning to get ready for work. He slipped out of bed, the Frenchman still snoring softly, and shuffled over to the corner with a jar. He paused, staring down blankly at the jar as he remembered…oh…right… “FUCKING ‘ELL!†He growled in annoyance, throwing the empty jar so it cracked and broke against the wall. After the Spy got over being startled awake by his outburst (And a trip to the bathroom was made), all was dressed and ready and the work day was on with a crackle of the Announcer’s voice over the speakers. The Sniper positioned himself at a boarded up window – sunlight peeking in. All seemed no different then a usual day – except perhaps minus a few yellow-filled jars. He re-positioned himself multiple times, attempting to get comfortable. His lanky legs were hung slack and open, but the feel of sitting on the wooden crate was off. He finally got comfortable and it was back to work, teeth glinting as he lined up a perfect shot and BLAM, a BLU demoman down in a poof of red. … The day crawled by. At the end of it, the Sniper was tired and sitting on his bed after dinner. He went to adjust himself, biting his lip as he paused, but then pulled on the lips of his…vulva to change how his underwear sat. Had he been rubbing it funny, in how he sat on the box? “Fucking…nnnnngg,†He groaned in annoyance. He didn’t know how to deal with this thing in everyday life. Now, Sniper was no child, he’d seen a vagina before, be it he preferred men, he’d laid a woman or two in his time, read porno mags, all that jazz. He didn’t even think it was an ugly organ; some women were awful inviting looking. But the fact it was all attached to him now made it this kind of…mystical thing. He felt like he could break himself, or that all he knew about pleasing a women somehow didn’t apply to HIM. He felt like a newbie to his own body. This was not acceptable. No girly parts were going to conquer HIM and ruin HIS day, temporary or not. And he usually wanked every day, and now it was almost 48 hours since. He was getting horny for it. “Alroight,†He told himself, getting out a hand mirror and stripping his clothes and sunglasses off. It was damn hot out anyway. “Let’s have a go at it.†He spread his legs and leaned his back against the wall, and positioned the mirror so he could see himself. It was the first good look he’d gotten, besides just looking down. NNngggg…well, not terrible? He’d seen less attractive vaginas. That’s it, be positive. Positive as you can be missing your favorite organ. Fucking hell. Sniper trailed his hand up and felt at his pubic hair. That at least was the same, dark and bushy as ever. It was thinner down lower though, so it was easy for him to see his pink inner folds, and…well he was looking at it like a tiny cock, from his angle. He licked his lips and reached down, spreading himself open more. God that felt so weird. It seemed decently sized, his clit, going by the few he’d seen. Head almost the width of a dime, and tucked into his shaft’s foreskin so you could barely see it. Maybe it would act like a cock and grow a bit, with some coaxing. The larger it looked the more at home the Sniper would feel, he thought. Speaking of coaxing, just sitting like this was starting to give him the groin tingles. He used his free hand and pulled back on the bunched foreskin covering the head of the clit. “Ahhhh!†He gasped, releasing it and dropping the mirror. The Spy wasn’t joking, it WAS sensitive. He used one finger this time; just pulling it back slowly, repositioning the mirror to watch. The lighter colored head popped out like a bean. He felt a tight twinge in his nethers, like a flexing of muscles he didn’t understand, and the clit gave a twitch. OH…that felt familiar. And GOOD. He gave a low groan, his eyes lidding as he let go of the foreskin and just started gently swirling his finger on the whole of the thing. It was SO responsive, all it needed was a light touch, lighter then he was used to. His mind wandered and he couldn’t hold the mirror any more, much as he liked watching…he couldn’t deny he was a voyeur. His eyes closed completely and he just wandered all his fingers about in the hot folds, which seemed to be flushing with heat like the rest of him. As he played his fingers brushed against - his new entrance. A slickness immediately stuck to his fingertips. He was getting wet. ‘A perfectly normal Vagina!’ Medic’s words echoed in his mind. Well, all seemed to be working, he thought sarcastically, yea… Damp fingers pet over his clit. “Nnnnng!†He gasped deeply. Oh…OH…alright. Yes, that was much better. Like precum on a cock head, slick and sensitive. Oh god was it sensitive. He dunked his fingers down again, finding even more wet waiting for him. Instead of coming back up right away he swirled around down there, enjoying the sensation. Everything felt so slick and good. He was so caught up in it he didn’t think about how much he was against it the other day, as he slipped the tip of his finger inside himself. “AAhh ohhh…fuck…†He growled, back falling to the bed and wiggling his narrow hips. His single digit was barely inside 2 inches, but it felt like a sparking fire of overwhelming new feeling as his palm pressed into his hardening clit while he gently finger fucked himself. His other hand got in on the action, he wanted to try jerking himself off as he did that. Sniper bit his lip as he removed the finger trailing wetness up to his drying clit. He arched his back, pinching softly around himself with thumb and forefinger. Oh he WAS getting erect, he could feel it. The smallest erection ever but it felt large as his old member in his mind. He opened his eyes to look, fingers spreading himself. His clit was at attention, much as a clit could be. It wasn’t a big obvious erect cock, and it wasn’t sticking straight out, but…dammit it WAS erect. Engorged and wet from his juices, the head peeking out a bit on it’s own from the foreskin. The Sniper stared with interest, stroking his finger along it’s one inch shaft. It felt HARD, like there was a taught little tendon in there. Bloody hell it felt amazing, every touch like fire. His back hit the bed, groin burning. He could cum, he could do it…if he kept stimulating himself it should…orgasm, yea? In theory. Sniper used his second hand and inserted a finger again. His insides tensed around the intrusion, but he got back to massaging his burning little erection, and soon everything felt amazing. He pressed inside deeper, far as his finger could reach. He wigged it around. Everything was new and different. He groaned deeply, legs tensing as he felt like he could cum as he swirled his finger faster over his clit. If it was like usual he’d have cum by now, this all seemed to be taking a LONG while. Sure, the build-up was incredible, but if he was this aroused and had not cum yet how could he… “Come’on already,†He growled, pinching at himself like jerking off a little cock, speeding up his finger twitching, his other hand mostly just sitting inside him, he couldn’t coordinate both at once. It was SO wet and…â€Nnnnng!†He pressed his legs together, tensing, but then dropped limp, ceasing. It HURT. It was TOO damn sensitive. He wanted to cum so bad now, and it felt like he almost HAD, but he just couldn’t. It was like he was on some ledge he couldn’t go over, it was frustrating as all hell. He’d never had this problem before… “Dammit,†He sat up, looking down at himself again and squishing his legs together then open again. He gasped, rolling his hips about. Fuck it felt GOOD, what the hell was wrong? He was so close. “Oh no…fickle orgasm Cher?†The Sniper clenched his legs together, all the color draining from his face. “YOU BLOODY PEEPIN’ SNAKE!†“I came in when ze day was over, wanted to see how you were, and hon hon I guess you are jus- MON DIEU PUT THAT DOWN!†The Spy scrambled mid sentence as the Sniper trained his laser sight on him. “I JUST WANTED TO ‘ELP!†Spy smiled covering his groin as the laser drifted lower. “Help me arse, you’re a peeping tom.†He cocked his rifle, and looked at the bulge in the Spy’s pants through his scope. “And yer hard.†“And by ze look of it so are YOU.†Spy smirked nervously. “Cher, when ‘ave you known me to ever be anything different?†The Aussie snarled and did not move the gun. “Okay - okay…I promise – NOT to do anything you do not want. Come now, let me ‘elp you, oui? You won’t regret it!†He was keeping a surprisingly confident face for someone with a gun aimed at their testicals. After a tense pause, the Sniper lowered his gun. The Spy breathed a sigh of relief. The Sniper leaned his gun back on the bedside table, and allowed the Spy to come and crawl onto the bed. He eyed the Spy, but…god did he want him now, after getting over the initial shock. The Spy WAS right, he knew he was like this, the Sniper accepted that, and unconventional as their relationship was, he loved the man. “Now, Monsieur,†The Spy purred as he loosened his tie and threw off his jacket, “What can I do for you to ease that burning in your groin?†“It that obvious?†He furrowed his brow. “I just think you need a little…finesse. You can’t jam away at a clit like you do a cock.†The Spy breathed a sigh of relief as he tossed his pants and shoes to the side. His erection bulged against his red underwear - briefs with a thong back. “I…I was bein’ slow at first!†The Sniper huffed like he was being told he knew nothing of pleasing women. He wasn’t a newbie but the Spy as he knew from all his boasting, had a LOT of sexual experience. The Spy gently pulled down his briefs and freed his erection over the top band. The Sniper felt suddenly defensive. “You aren’t gettin’ that anywhere near me groin unless I say so.†He stated firmly. “As I said, nothing you don’t want.†He nodded, “I just needed to get eet out of eet’s confines.†He crawled up and onto his lover, “Now, you always love blowjobs, oui?†He grinned, mask still on. Feeling about as reassured as one could in such a position, the Sniper leaned back on the bed and put his head on the pillow. “Alroight, then suck me off.†His lips curled, feeling more confident. ‘Now this is more like it’, the Spy thought. He made a show of removing his impossibly thin leather gloves, biting the last one off. He then pet his hands up the lanky man’s legs, parting them slowly and getting his first real good look at what respawn had done. It was quite a mind fuck of an image, the Sniper there in the fading shuttered daylight, hairy and muscular, but with a wet, aroused vagina. ‘Oh I’m going to make you scream,’ The Spy thought haughtily, making himself comfortable as he nestled himself between the Sniper’s legs. “Ahhhhh! NNnnggg…!†The Sniper gasped as he felt the Spy thickly lick his tongue, then suck his whole mouth over him. He was slow and precise, teasing his hard shaft and licking down through all his labia. “Jesus Spoi!†“Mmmmm,†He hummed, noting it still tasted like him, though maybe a little less salty. Still, nice and musky after a day of work, just how he liked his men. “Now relax…†The Spy was right to be confident, he knew what he was doing as he swirled his tongue over his clit, occasionally sucking, keeping with the Sniper as he writhed under his pleasuring. It was slowly intensified, his tongue tense at the tip to tease more firmly. The Aussie groaned deep in his throat, feeling that tight heat welling back up. He bucked his hips into the Spy’s face as he hit a particularly good spot. It started to feel like before, teetering on an edge, like an itch he couldn’t scratch. “Fuck fuck fuck,†He gasped, legs tensing straight then slack again. “Close, Monsieur?†The Spy came up for air, licking his lips happily. “Why you bloody well stop?†The Sniper demanded, gasping. The Spy did not respond, but instead dove right back in, spreading the Aussie wide and putting his whole head into it. He took the whole of his erect clit into his mouth. He was indeed pretty sizeable, he could bob up and down on him while flicking his tongue on the head. He reveled in the feeling of having his whole face enveloped in his smell, breathing hotly into his pubic hair. “Nngggg!†The Sniper arched wildly, eyes rolling back into his head as he shuddered. So close so close…he felt the Spy’s hands grab his ass hard, and Sniper did the same to the bed sheets. His breaths were fast and short but then exploded into a strangled wail, which melted into deep moaning breaths as he felt that tightness sear away into a heat that engulfed his entire abdomen. His vision whited out momentarily and his whole body fell slack like he’d been shot. He’d hit so many plateaus he couldn’t believe he’d finally fallen off the edge. Everything tingled and he could feel a spasming in his insides, which reminded him of when he came spurting cum…only this time instead there was just a melted, wet, hot mess and a twitching clit. The Spy trailed off him and smirked like a cat who’d got the cream. He crawled up onto him, and could feel his heart beating fast. There was no doubt he’d climaxed. “Bloody ‘ell, fuck…†Sniper gasped, gripping onto the Spy and snugging his body to his own. He was enjoying the whole body tingle that came with his powerful orgasm. The Spy’s loose vest and shirt were pushed open so he could feel his chest directly. “Good?†The Spy wanted some feedback for his efforts. He liked how pleased the Aussie looked. “Good,†He echoed, twitching, “It was so intense for a moment it hurt, but it was a good hurt…fuck…†The Spy chuckled, pleased. His now rock hard erection slid against the Sniper as he repositioned, and purely by accident it slicked into the other man’s wet folds. “Ahh ahhh,†The Australian gasped, it had pressed into his hyper sensitized clit. “Desole`,†The Spy apologized, not wanting to say how GREAT that felt, as he moved away. “No…no that felt damn nice. Heh, you know I love it when you rub me dick against yours, roight? Felt loike that…†“Eet would be ze equivalent, oui.†The Sniper paused in thought, holding the other man close. He was so happy he was being so big about all this, treating him with respect. He could have easily been a troll about it like everything else. He looked at his face, the mask still on. He’d seen him without it, the Spy trusted him that much. But it was fun and kinky to sometimes leave it on. But right now, he wanted to see his face. “Git the rest of your kit off.†The Spy complied, leaving the mask to last. It slipped off, his short dark brown, age peppered hair requiring a moment of fixing to not look like a total mess. “You going to take care of me then?†He stroked a hand over his cock with a smirk. “I’m all wet, you know…†The Sniper felt at himself. Wet and…aching. He was often bottom to the Spy, though that was usually his arse aching for some fucking. But now, he had another option. He didn’t know how long it’d be till they fixed this issue, could be by tomorrow, they might not get another chance. The idea of it the other day sickened him, the Spy treating him like a woman, but he WASN’T treating him that way. He still looked at him the same way. ‘Don’t get all chocked up about it, that’s what a woman would do, and how is it any different what hole he fucks you in?’ “Ah, well, that is what those do,†Spy chuckled, reaching out carefully and petting his fingers through his lover’s labia. Was he really suggesting what he thought he was? Would he really get to try it? The look the other was giving him WAS his ‘I want you to fuck me’ expression. He got back on his side facing the Sniper, and held onto his cock to position it back into his wet labia. The Sniper didn’t protest so he gently grinded his hips, slicking against him. Soon the Aussie was grinding softly back. “Do you want me inside you, Cher?†Spy asked carefully, after they enjoyed the feeling for a time. “I think I do,†The sniper licked his lips. The Spy sat up, “I’ll go slow. If you don’t like eet, you can suck me off, but either way you’re taking care of this.†He gave the Sniper’s ass a teasing smack as he petted his own cock with his other hand. After a growl of approval, the Sniper nodded, “Alroight,†He got up and turned the Spy onto his back, “But I’m on top.†Oh THIS was fun, “As you wish,†Spy got comfortable and got ready for a show. ... Well, there was no need for lube, and he felt plenty ready. ‘This ought to be easier then in the arse,’ the Sniper thought, thinking about how vaginas were meant for this. He wondered how it would feel… Straddling the lithe Frenchman, he used his hand to steady his cock and positioned himself accordingly. He slowly lowered onto him, biting his lip momentarily. It was tight – to him, because he wasn’t used to it. But whoever’s pattern he ‘borrowed’ for that body part was not a virgin either, he wouldn’t be stretching out anything for the first time. In fact, it surprised the Sniper as the tightness melted suddenly as the head popped in. “OOoooOhhh,†He groaned, easing up then pressing down again. He kept at, a little bit at a time, till he settled down fully on the Spy, their pubic hair bristling. “Ahhhh, fuck…†So deep inside, so wet…he gyrated his hips and tensed, causing him to clamp down on the Spy. The Spy looked like he was enjoying it just as much. He moved his hips with him, then gave a small rolling thrust. The Sniper groaned approvingly. “How does that feel?†The Spy asked. “I’m…dammit…fuck, it feels amazing.†He looked the other assassin in the eye, “Not that your cock didn’t ever feel amazing in me arse.†He lifted up on his knees a bit then settled back down, gyrating his hips again. “It’s a whole different feelin’…I feel really full…†“I must say I actually am a little envious,†The Spy chuckled, “I think eet would be fun to feel what ‘the other side’ feels for a day.†“Want it, you can take it mate.†The Sniper laughed back, “I’ll be happy to get back to normal.†“But in the meantime, you want me to fuck you senseless, oui?†The Spy grinned deviously. The Aussie spread his legs some more so he could lean in and settle his chest against the Spy’s, making himself comfortable. The angle changed how the Spy was hitting inside him, it made him press into his front wall more. The Spy grabbed his ass and gave some slow, controlled hip thrusts. “OOOhhoohohh,†He groaned low. Spy licked at his neck, then started nipping at it. “Harder,†Sniper growled. He meant the biting but the fucking wouldn’t hurt to be faster too…he was getting used to the intrusion each passing minute. The Spy complied, doing everything harder, the biting, the ass gripping, and also deeper thrusts, slow on the withdrawal then fast and tensed on the up stroke. “Bloody ‘ell yes!†The Sniper gasped, digging his nails into the Spy’s chest, “Holy fuck…†He’d meant to try and do the fucking but it felt so overwhelming, and Spy seemed to know what he was doing…he trusted him… “I could get better leverage if you roll over…†Spy purred into his ear as he nipped it. The Sniper complied, sitting up. Spy’s cock popped out of him, which made him gasp. He got onto his hands and knees, looking behind just in time to see the Spy latch onto him and press his cock back into him. The Spy stopped as he hilted him, pressing his chest to his back so he could groan and pet him all over. The angle was working well for Sniper, feeling heat begin to build back inside him. The Spy’s cock head was hitting his g-spot every time he pulled outwards – which was with every thrust as he started to fuck him with long, firm strokes. Sniper cried out in gasps, cursing and gripping the bed sheets. His wetness dripped out and over his folds. Which was good because as the Spy started fingering his clit it was so wet he almost couldn’t get a grip. “Yes yes fuck…fuck me fucking ‘ell Spoi…†The Sniper groaned, pressing into his thrusts now, which were slowly increasing in speed. ‘Such an amazing view,’ the Spy thought, smacking Sniper’s ass as he sat up, not stopping his thrusts. He had to stop fingering him as he gripped his hips as he sped up to about as fast as he could. The Sniper was groaning with every thrust, swallowing up his lover’s cock as deep as it would go. He shuddered as that feeling he got before started to return – a feeling like he could cum. It felt so GOOD but he didn’t know what to do, it was like he was melting and this hot heat was in deep inside him, it was different from the tightness of the clitoral orgasm earlier…He kept cursing and moaning as the feeling heightened. “I’m not going to hold on much longer,†The Spy groaned. “Don’t stop I feel close too…fuck…bloody ‘ell…†He moved his hips with the Spy smacking hard against him. The Spy was used to coming inside the Aussie but this was different ground, he was about to ask if he should pull out but the Sniper cut him off, “Don’t stop – cum inside me, just don’t stop!†The Spy complied, snarling and leaning over the Sniper pressing into his back. He gripped him hard as his thrusts got fast and sudden. “Ahhh ahhhh, AGGnnn!†He tensed as he came, spurting with each deep thrust. He couldn’t exactly feel the Spy cumming inside but he could feel his cock throbbing, and a sudden gush of wetness. The sudden change in sensation and the quick, hard thrusts caused the Sniper to finally explode in a deep vaginal orgasm. It wasn’t as intense as the clitoral one, and he wasn’t even really sure he’d cum as it was happening, but all he knew was he felt satisfied. He convulsed and fell against the Spy, “Stop! Stop…fuck…†He twitched, his insides spasming around the Spy’s cock. The Spy stopped his motions and both of them fell to the bed, sweaty and worn out. The Spy’s cock was still inside the Sniper as he spooned onto him. The Sniper’s mind was kind of blown for a moment, gasping and catching his breath. He finally wriggled out of the Spy’s grasp, “Alrioght, get your cock out of me already,†He groaned. Spy stayed limp on the bed as he pulled away from him and turned to face him, laying on his side. “That was lovely,†The Spy smirked, quite sated. “Look’it you, gloatin’ like a tomcat.†“Did you climax Monsieur?†“I…I think so, felt different then earlier…I’m not accustomed to how it all feels compared to how I’m used to.†He looked completely worn out. “Long as you are satisfied,†Spy pet over the bite marks he left on his shoulders and neck. “You know, you’re a peeping snake, but such a gentleman sometimes.†“I ‘ave my moments.†The Spy grinned. … “Everyzhing seems normal, you feel as you should, ja?†It was a week later and the Sniper had re-spawned after a kill, male genitals and all. Seems the work order had gone through. Thankfully no one else on the team found out in that time. He and Spy had their fun, but he was VERY happy to be back to normal. He was looking forward to seeing him that night, and even though Spy had treated him like a man, he still felt like he needed to reclaim his masculinity – the very male part of him that was fully intending to hump the SHIT out of that Frenchman. “It’s loike I remember it,†The Sniper said plainly. “Gute gute,†The Medic removed his nitrile gloves and took a second look at the x-rays. He gasped. “Doc?†The Sniper said with alarm. “Herr you lied to me! You VHERE fooling around!†“W-what! No!†The Sniper sweated, what did the Medic know? “I think congratulations are in order!†He smiled, “It seems you are PREGNANT!†“WHAT?†The Sniper paled like the blood drained out of him, “After just a week?? And but – aren’t I all a man again?!†“How many times did you have intercourse?†“Just loike…maybe 3 times! What that matter? You never warned me about using protection!†The Medic burst out laughing. The Sniper kept staring at him like he was panicking. “HERR…aahhaaha, I can’t…I am only joking…OH ho ho your FACE!†The Sniper’s face fell instantly, glaring at him. “That isn’t funny doc.†“YOU FELL FOR IT, YOU REALLY THOUGHT - †The Medic kept laughing. “I’m leaving,†The Sniper grumped and got down, putting his pants back on. “OH Herr I’ll want a report on all zhat lovemaking!†The medic called after him, still chuckling. (Tumblr post for this fic: http://lithefider.tumblr.com/post/36571245051/respawn-bloody-glitched-sniper-spy )
Oh. Yes. Perfect. And I think Medic is going after Spy's Number One Troll trophy there...
Damn, I was looking forward for the Sniper to get pregnant! That would have been hilarious. I enjoyed reading this and a sequel would have been warmly welcomed.
Can't... stop... laughing! Thanks for that, it was great!