[ inception ] [ fanfic / afanfic ] [ dis / trade / srs / projects / 3d / fanart / afanart / oek / tits / rpg / dumps / cosplay ] [ offtopic / vg / zombies / gay / resources / upl ]
Return Entire Thread

1 .

well that was certainly a nice change of pace from the regular tenth class mary-sue/gary-stu! It was interesting to see a class not be involved in the battle, and especially not to be brutally overpowered.
The writing itself is fairly nice too, though you did use "Oh, how I..." 3 times in the span of a few lines and I think it took a bit away from the flow. It's a pretty dramatic line to use, but over using it takes that special something out of I think.
Overall, Great job!