Okay, so over in the new request thread, a couple of people brought up the fact that we rarely ever see homophobia from these guys, aside from the occasional Scoutburst. My brain kind of started writing it the moment I walked away from the computer. So now I finished doing dishes and I'm back to write-write it. While listening to mash-ups revolving around 'Llorando'... ~~~The Argument~~~ It took sixteen men to pry the brawling heavies apart, and with that, both teams found themselves ejected from the only drinking establishment within miles of their bases. They all wind up in an empty lot, standing in the dry weeds and dust, glaring across the small divide and waiting for an explanation, the two engineers standing front and center to mediate, the two medics backing their respective heavies, and the rest scattered about in a loose cluster, men of RED to one side and the men of BLU to the other. "Now just what is the problem here?" The BLU Engineer repeats, pulling off his hardhat to wipe at his brow. "He starts it." The RED Heavy stabs an accusing finger towards his counterpart. "Not true." "You start it when you say what you said. Apologize, or this time, I will finish it." "Never! Is true." "Fellas, fellas," The RED Engineer mirrors his own counterpart's tired, hapless posture. "Right now, let's not worry about who started what how, we just wanna know the why." "He is rude to Doktor." The RED Heavy glares. "Your Doktor is a homosexual." The BLU Heavy sneers. "So what? So am I. You want to fight about it?" "No, we really don't." The BLU Medic tugs at his Heavy's arm. "We are in town. Come on, you know the rules. On Monday we will be back on the field killing them again." The others are frozen, looks of surprise on the faces of the BLUs, looks of realization or resignation on the faces of the REDs. "Those two're homosexuals? Together?" The BLU Engineer points at the RED Heavy and Medic. "Those two aren't?" The RED Sniper laughs, pointing at the BLU Heavy and Medic. The BLU Heavy growls, but his team holds him back. "Well, rules or no rules." The RED Demoman staggers forward and claps his team's Heavy on the shoulder. "If it's a fight with this man you want, it's a fight you'll get, and any fight you pick with him, you pick with me." "We don't want a fight--" The BLU Medic starts. "Fight." The BLU Heavy snorts. "Men like that cannot fight." "Oh? Then how come we kill you and your doktor so many times last week? Maybe you cannot fight!" "Heavy," The RED Medic puts a hand on his lover's arm as well, gives the BLU Medic an apologetic smile. "We will have many opportunities to prove ourselves on the battlefield." "True." The RED Spy circles around the perimeter of the group. "For now, I hope we can all try to get along. At least pretend to. The company way..." "Right. No fighting in towns." The BLU Soldier nods. "Disgrace to the uniform... Save it for the war, privates." The RED Engineer coughs and steps a little closer to center. "Right. Well. I mean, not that I can't-- understand, why you boys might... might take issue." "It's fuckin' gross is what it is." The RED Scout nods, taking a step away from his own side. "No rule saying I can't beat on you in town, boyo." The RED Demoman warns. The RED Pyro sits down with a soft huff, crossing his arms, and remains planted next to the RED Medic. The RED Soldier takes a few steps towards the BLU team. "I can't even believe what's going on... This is-- This is-- UNAMERICAN, that's what it is!" Several of his teammates roll their eyes. The BLU Soldier matches him stride for stride to the center, though. "Mister, I submit to you that there is NOTHING more American than the bonds of manly bonding that two men bound together on the battlefield... bond! Manfully!" "Doesn't hurt nobody far as I can tell." The BLU Engineer agrees, and the BLU Pyro trails after him the few steps to center. "No." The RED Sniper steps closer to his team's Heavy and Medic. "Reckon it doesn't." "Chucklenuts here is right, though," The BLU Scout nods to the RED Scout. "I mean, it is fuckin' gross, kissing an old dude? And what do you even do with another guy?" "I could tell you sometime, but you might prefer to keep your innocence, boy." The BLU Spy walks right past the divide, right past the two soldiers, to stand with the REDs. They react with some surprise, though the breaking of barriers gives the engineers and soldiers the push they needed, to switch sides. The RED Scout crosses over to stand with the remaining BLUs, the BLU Pyro settles next to the REDs. "What's your game?" The RED Sniper asks, training a glare on the BLU Spy. "Game? Must all my motives me suspect? I am merely offering my support. Surely you did not think your teammates here were the only men in this war with an... appreciation, for... Greek love?" "I wouldn't say I have an appreciation for it myself." The BLU Engineer suddenly blushes. "I just-- I didn't think it was anything to start a fight over-- I mean, an off-the-clock fight!" "Nothing wrong with it." The RED Demoman shrugs. "If a couple of men find something in the middle of a war..." The BLU Soldier coughs and looks at his feet, frowns in thought. The RED Engineer shakes his head. "We're not talking about drunken handjobs in a foreign country somewhere, we're talking about a couple of men who could be with women and are choosing to-- to--" "Well, still. It doesn't make any difference to us. Thought we were all agreed on the rules here, and if you need to work something out with your fists, you dang well wait for Monday to do it. I'm not working with a bunch of petty children, I signed on to work with professionals." "I am a professional." The BLU Sniper says, remaining where he is. "Doesn't mean I have to like whatever goes on on the other side. And I was hired to be part of a team. My team's who I'm standing with." "And you?" The BLU Spy sidles up to the RED Sniper. "Is the matter personal to you, or just a matter of company pride?" "Well, I-- They're my mates." He fumbles. "You stand with your mates. Even if they're complete psychos..." "Hm. Pity..." He smirks, eyes sliding over the other man. "Well. If I can ever change your mind, you know where to find me... and I know where to find you..." "Well. Everyone over here agrees with me." The BLU Heavy draws himself up to his full height. "And some of them are from your team." "Yes. But some of our team do not agree." The BLU Medic takes a step towards the center. "... Doktor?" "I'm sorry." He looks down. "I wanted to take your side. God knows! I am not even saying I believe it is right, just..." "Doktor, come back over here. No more fighting in town, it will be fine." "Look at all of this!" He spreads his arms, to encompass the whole of both groups. "How is it going to be fine? Now the issue has arisen and everybody knows which men on his own team hold what position. It will change who trusts whom. It will change how any of us work together. All because you had to say something!" "You think this is my fault?" He steps forward, angry. "Fault... I don't even know about fault. But if you hadn't spoken, he would not have hit you, and then none of this would have happened, and none of us would be looking at each other differently." The men shuffle awkwardly, the standoff ending as they return to stand with their teams, some more reluctantly than others. "I am going back to the base." The BLU Medic sighs, pushing his glasses up his nosebridge. "If you want me to heal you when we get there, then you can apologize for starting this mess. Otherwise, you can sit by yourself with a steak over your eye, I don't even care." "Fine. Fine! I have steaks." The BLU Heavy storms off towards the bases as well, no apology made. "We should head home as well." The RED Medic smiles up at his Heavy, reaching up to touch his cheek gently. "I will be more than happy to heal you." "Good." The RED Heavy chuckles. "Do not think sandvich much good for black eye." The others trickle back towards their bases as well, partings awkward between those who had sided together despite company lines, and between those who had opposed each other in spite of same. The RED Sniper hangs back, watching his teammates go, watching their Demoman shake hands with the BLU Soldier, their interaction just slightly stiff, before they separate and go. The BLU Spy hangs back as well, just regarding him. "What?" The Sniper coughs. "In spite of all that ugliness, it is shaping up to be a fine night..." The Spy shrugs. "I believe the sunsets from that hill up there are particularly breathtaking. If you would care to join me?" The Sniper shrugs. He doesn't take the outstretched hand, but he heads for the hill along with the Spy. Nothing wrong in enjoying a nice sunset...